BEING BULLIED

 

If you are being bullied there is a lot you can do. While different tactics work for different people, the first thing you should do is try to work it out yourself.

Depending on how bad the bullying is (and as long as you do not feel at risk, scared or physically threatened) you might want to try and work it out yourself - as a first step.

The more empowered you are, and the more you can help yourself, the better chance you have to stop the bully.

If the bully does not change his behaviour, that is when talking to someone else can be really helpful.

The bully wants you to react. Their goal is to take away your power, make you sad and scared. And if you show them you are not sad and scared, they will often lose interest and they cannot take away your power.

Remember they want to upset you constantly so you get angry. If you do not get angry, the bully will lose their own power.

Remember that bullies are human - they eat, sleep and live just like you do. The only difference is that you are not a bully! Bullies act the way they do because they lack the attention or parental love and nurturing that you have. They are insecure and bully only to feel powerful.

Bullies look for a reaction from you and often lose interest if they are not given the satisfaction of getting one.

If You Feel Safe, Here Are Some Ways To Handle The Bully:

• Walk away when the bully approaches you. Try and imagine you are walking away from a stranger. Both you and your body language will show you do not care.
• Concentrate on thinking about something else (maybe a concert you want to go to, or a new outfit you want to buy).
• When the bully approaches you, count to 100 and keep walking. They will never see how upset you are.
• Stop yelling and walk away. Keep walking and do not turn around no matter what they say.
• When a bully calls you a name or tells you your sneakers are ugly - look at them in the eyes and laugh hysterically and say, "I know my sneakers are ugly." Keep laughing hysterically and walk away without any additional conversation.
• When the bully harasses you and calls you names, look them in the eyes, laugh and walk away without any additional conversation.

Just Walk Away from the Bully. 

Once you give your comeback line - it is so important to just walk away and keep walking! Do not react or respond. That is what the bully wants!

When you walk away you are taking away the bully's power!

Below is the mindset which you should have:-

Stay Positive.

It can be hard to remember all your good points when someone is doing their best to be negative. However, try to think of all the things you do well and remember that you are a valuable person. Thinking of how bad the bully must be feeling may also help you to stay positive.

Picture Your Bully Like This...

Picture your bully standing on their head with their body stretching - almost as if they were standing in front of a distorted mirror like the kind you see at a carnival. Listen to their voice as it comes out all distorted and warbled. And they have turned yellow with pink stripes. Now who is laughing?

Build An Armoured Shield Around You.

Visualize a tall armoured shield. Build that shield around you and when it is up, imagine all the things the bully is saying bouncing off that armoured shield.

Be Confident.

Bullies usually pick on people that they think are weaker than they are, so stand up to them. You might be scared but if you keep standing up to them, they will stop.

Other ways to conquer your bully and throw them off track:

• By loudly saying “leave me alone”
• Say something funny
• Look them in the eye and be nice to them

Keep out of the bully's way.

If you are afraid of your bully avoid places where your bully hangs out, or take a different route to school. If the bully does not see you, they cannot bully you.

Use The Buddy System Against Bullies.

Bullies feel empowered to bully one person, but rarely will they bully a group. Hang out with your friends. If the bully does feel like conquering the group, walk away.

If after using these tactics and the bullying does not stop, it may be time to ask for help. Do not be afraid to let someone know that you are being bullied. There are people who care about you and will help you.

Get Help - Tell An Adult About the Bully.

It may seem scary to tell someone but, telling will not only get you help, it will make you feel less afraid. If you are being physically bullied and are in danger, you must speak with a trusted adult immediately. And if you cannot go to your parents, seek out a trusted teacher, guidance counselor or school psychologist.

If you have told a grown-up before and they have not done anything about it, tell someone else. Tell them exactly what happened, who did the bullying, where and when it happened, how long it is been happening to you, and how it is making you feel. When you tell your teacher, guidance counselor or school psychologist, ask them what they will do to help stop the bullying. It is their job to help keep you safe. Most adults really care about bullying and will do everything they can to help you. Keep telling until someone does help you!

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