My friend, Ibrahim Ali

My friend Ibrahim Ali seems to be in the limelight most of the time. Watching from a distance, with great amusement at his antics really makes my day. Not a day goes by, without him scheming and plotting, always looking for the ultimate controversy that will seal his reputation as the Number One clown in the country. He does know what is going on though. He gets his kick from being able to tickle the nation. He doesn’t care too much about reputation and his hit-and-run tactics serves him well.

But he is also a great asset in the grand scheme of things. Before we condemn him, we should look at the big picture. His employment of reverse psychology has worked well. It has catapulted him into the Hall of Fame. He is the only politician that has the attention of everyone in this country. Not even Najib enjoys half the kind of 'popularity' he projects.

MCA, MIC and other BN component parties avoid him like the plague. Even the UMNO big-wigs know better than to cross him. He has made many of the UMNO leaders eat humble pie. The Opposition parties look the other way, when he directs his attacks at them. No one really makes any effort to condemn his unconventional ways of creating controversies.

Most non-Malays today are immune to his daily nonsensical antics. To everyone he is just a harmless kitten trying to roar like a Lion. Even the government and the police see no threat in his little, stout stature and they continue to let him make a fool of himself. While the police detain harmless protesters dressed in alleged Communist T-shirts which they see as a threat to the King, he is largely ignored as a little pest that won’t harm a fly.

A blessing in disguise

The Government and the police seem to have better things to do, like trying to convince the Malaysian public against making a fool of themselves at the Bersih rally, than to try and charge him for being a harmless nuisance to the public.

His insistence on marching in protest on July 9 shows his childish demeanour. A simple half-day democracy march by a mere million people is seen as a Doomsday March to him. He must stop it at all costs, even if it means blood may be shed. His call for a pre-emptive strike by locking up all the Bersih organizers is his easy-way-out solution.

But erratic rabble-rousers like him are a rarity. Pakatan Rakyat needs the likes of him to sow anger in the masses. And now as more and more Malaysians sees Ibrahim Ali in a new light, and begin to appreciate his gift of reverse psychology, people are beginning to interpret his actions in a reverse way.

Everything he does can be a blessing in disguise. Single-handedly shooing away most of the non-Malays to the Opposition, his latest attack on the Malays and PAS will only serve to distance more Malays from the BN.

He sees the Bersih march as the disintegration of Malay unity, but isn’t that what Perkasa stands for? He is the self appointed Champion of the Malays. His goal is to unite the Malays and he will defend Article 153 of the Constitution until the end of the days.

We may never know what his true agenda is, but I sure do support his current agenda. Even James Bond will take his hat off to him. With overwhelming support and protection from the current regime, he also has a license to k…..er..er.. to incite hatred and fear. He likes to think that the fate of the nation lies in his chubby little hands.

Double agent

He may be a double agent for all we know, but he sure has the tools to go undercover. A change of government and a new nation is a Mission Impossible that only a true maestro like Ibrahim Ali can conceive. And should he succeed against all odds; I wouldn’t mind giving him my vote to be the next Prime Minister of this country (I’m joking). For all we know, he may actually be the Chosen One. So, all hail the Chosen One.

Pakatan Rakyat, unlike BN, is too straight and honest to do what must be done. Maybe a fall guy is needed to complete the transformation. Anyone, who knows the Hunchback of Notre Dame, will know how lonely the guy is. If we continue to curse and release our anger on him, it will only make him retreat further into a corner. So, let’s give him rope. He will know what to do with it.

For other Malaysians, let's be focused with the task at hand. Yellow is the colour, and your presence on July 9 will turn the tide into a Tsunami of yellow. Even Ultraman has to run away from the Magnificent Malaysians, so who is Ibrahim Ali?

And to those who wonder whether the Chosen One is my friend? Well, the enemy of my enemy is my friend. I’d rather have friends than enemies, and I don’t think Ibrahim Ali is my enemy, anymore than you are. See you on July 9!

- Malaysia Chronicle