Prove that the crocodile is longer than
it is wide.
Lemma 1. The crocodile is longer than it is green: Let's look at the crocodile.
Lemma 1. The crocodile is longer than it is green: Let's look at the crocodile.
It is long on the top and on the
bottom, but it is green only on the top.
Therefore, the crocodile is longer than
it is green.
Lemma 2. The crocodile is greener than it is wide: Let's look at the crocodile.
Lemma 2. The crocodile is greener than it is wide: Let's look at the crocodile.
It is green along its length and width,
but it is wide only along its width.
Therefore,
the crocodile is greener than it is wide.
From Lemma 1 and Lemma 2, we conclude that the crocodile is longer than it is wide.
From Lemma 1 and Lemma 2, we conclude that the crocodile is longer than it is wide.
The
strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone
in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of one of the older
workmen. After several minutes, the older worker had had enough. "Why
don't you put your money where your mouth is," he said. "I will bet a
week's wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that
outbuilding that you won't be able to wheel back." "You're on, old
man," the braggart replied. "Let's see what you got." The old
man reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then, nodding to
the young man, he said, "All right. Get in."
A father and his son go into the
grocery store and when they happened to be in the condom aisle. The son asks
his father why there are so many different boxes of condoms. The father
replies, ''Well, you see that 3-pack? That's for when you're in high school.
You have 2 for Friday night and 1 for Saturday night.'' The son then asks his
father, ''What's the 6-pack for?'' The father replies, ''Well, that's for when
you're in college. You have 2 for Friday night, 2 for Saturday night, and 2 for
Sunday morning.'' Then the son asks his father what the 12-pack is for. The
father replies, ''Well, that's for when you're married. You have one for
January, one for February, one for March, one for.....''
Every time, an Indian walks into the chief's teepee, he finds the chief is masturbating. They finally realize this is a serious problem, so they fix him up with a nice woman, and she starts living with him in his teepee.
One day, one of the Indians walks into the chief's teepee and there's the chief masturbating again. He says, "Chief, what are you doing? We fix you up with a beautiful woman."
The chief says, "Her arm gets tired."
My wife said last night: "You treat our marriage like it's some sort of game."
Unfortunately, this cost her 12 points and a bonus chance.
A woman was chatting with her next-door neighbor. "I feel really good today. I started out this morning with an act of unselfish generosity. I gave a five-ringgit bill to a bum."
"You gave a bum five whole ringgit? That's a lot of money to just give away. What did your husband say about it?"
“When the hospital nurse asked me if my bowels had moved, I assured her that they had come with me as I headed to the toilet.”
A cop pulls over a guy in a vehicle.
Every time, an Indian walks into the chief's teepee, he finds the chief is masturbating. They finally realize this is a serious problem, so they fix him up with a nice woman, and she starts living with him in his teepee.
One day, one of the Indians walks into the chief's teepee and there's the chief masturbating again. He says, "Chief, what are you doing? We fix you up with a beautiful woman."
The chief says, "Her arm gets tired."
My wife said last night: "You treat our marriage like it's some sort of game."
Unfortunately, this cost her 12 points and a bonus chance.
A woman was chatting with her next-door neighbor. "I feel really good today. I started out this morning with an act of unselfish generosity. I gave a five-ringgit bill to a bum."
"You gave a bum five whole ringgit? That's a lot of money to just give away. What did your husband say about it?"
“When the hospital nurse asked me if my bowels had moved, I assured her that they had come with me as I headed to the toilet.”
A cop pulls over a guy in a vehicle.
"Your eyes are
awfully red. Have you been drinking?"
"Gee,
officer," the man said.
"Your eyes are
awfully glazed - have you been eating doughnuts?"
A young couple got married and left on their honeymoon.
When they got back, the
bride immediately called her mother.
Her mother asked,
"how was the honeymoon?"
"Oh, mama,"
she replied, "The honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic ... "
Suddenly she burst out
crying ...
A young banker decided to get his first tailor-made suit. So, he went to the finest tailor in town and got measured for a suit. A week later he went in for his first fitting. He put on the suit and he looked fabulous, he felt that in this suit he can do business.
As he was preening himself in front of the mirror, he reached down to put his hands in the pockets and to his surprise, he noticed that there were no pockets. He mentioned this to the tailor who asked him, "Didn't you tell me you were a banker?"
The young man answered, "Yes, I did."
To this, the tailor said, "Whoever heard of a banker with his hands in his own pockets?"
A young banker decided to get his first tailor-made suit. So, he went to the finest tailor in town and got measured for a suit. A week later he went in for his first fitting. He put on the suit and he looked fabulous, he felt that in this suit he can do business.
As he was preening himself in front of the mirror, he reached down to put his hands in the pockets and to his surprise, he noticed that there were no pockets. He mentioned this to the tailor who asked him, "Didn't you tell me you were a banker?"
The young man answered, "Yes, I did."
To this, the tailor said, "Whoever heard of a banker with his hands in his own pockets?"
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