Hisham
passed away. His was provided RM100,000 for an elaborate funeral.
As the last guests departed from the ceremony,
his wife, Aishah, turned to her oldest friend.
"Well, I'm sure Hisham
would be pleased," she said.
"I'm sure you're
right," replied Liza, who lowered her voice and leaned in close.
"How much did this really
cost?"
"All of it," said
Aishah. "One hundred thousand."
"No!" Liza exclaimed.
"I mean, it was very nice, but RM100,000?"
Aishah answered. "The
funeral was RM16,500. I donated RM1,000 to the mosque. The food and drinks were
another RM5,500. The rest went for the memorial stone."
Liza computed quickly.
"$77,000 for a memorial stone? My God, how big is it?"
"One and a half
carats!"
What is the definition of a secret?
Something
you tell to one person at a time!
A boy
had reached four without giving up the habit of sucking his thumb, though his
mother had tried everything from bribery to reasoning to painting it with lemon
juice to discourage the habit.
Finally, she tried threats,
warning her son that, "If you don't stop sucking your thumb, your stomach
is going to blow up like a balloon."
Later
that day, walking in the park, mother and son saw a pregnant woman sitting on a
bench. The four-year-old thought of the lady gravely for a minute, then spoke
to her saying, "Uh-oh ... I know what "you've" been doing!"
Customer:
Waiter, I’m in a hurry! Will the pancakes be long?
Waiter:
No sir, round!
Healthcare
costs are rising uncontrollably across the world.
In America, taxes have been on the rise just to
pay for them.
In England, they have begun rationing healthcare
services and, in some cases, they have waiting lists for services just to
reduce costs even more.
In fact, they now have a nine-month waiting list
for abortions!
Have you heard the
rumour going around about butter?
Never mind, I
shouldn’t spread it!
What is the definition of tomorrow?
One of the greatest labour-saving devices of
today!
Miss Bea, the church organist, was in her
eighties and had never been married. She was much admired for her sweetness and
kindness to all. The pastor came to call on her one afternoon early in the
spring, and she welcomed him into her Victorian parlour. She invited him to
have a seat while she prepared some tea.
As he sat facing her old pump
organ, the young minister noticed a cut-glass bowl sitting on top of it, filled
with water. In the water floated, of all things, a condom.
The pastor was utterly shocked and surprised.
Imagine his curiosity! Most probably, Miss Bea must have flipped or
something!...
When she returned with tea and cookies, they
began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water
and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him, and he could resist
no longer.
"Miss Bea," he said,
"I wonder if you would tell me about this?" (pointing to the bowl).
"Oh, yes," she replied, "isn't it wonderful? I was walking downtown last fall and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to put it on the organ, keep it wet, and it would prevent disease. And you know... I haven't had a cold all winter!"
As usual, we remind you to take your Memo Plus Gold daily. It will help to keep you alert and mentally sharp. For more information or to order for Memo Plus Gold, please visit : https://oze.my.
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