When the family loses its sacred place, the nation pays the price

 

A NATIONAL reflection for all concerned Malaysians for 2026: Malaysia recorded 190,304 marriages in 2024—slightly higher than in 2023. There were 60,457 divorces in 2024, an increase of about 4.1% from the roughly 58,095 divorces in 2023.

The Crude Marriage Rate (CMR) remained around 5.6 per 1,000 population, while the Crude Divorce Rate (CDR) rose to 1.8 per 1,000 population.

While more couples tied the knot in 2024 compared with the previous year, divorces also rose indicating that marriage remains common but that marital dissolution continues to be a significant social pattern.

Malaysia often speaks of family as the foundation of society. Yet rising divorce rates, domestic conflict, elder neglect, and fractured parent-child relationships tell a more troubling story.

The institution of the family is no longer experienced as sacred by many Malaysians—not because families are rejected, but because their moral meaning has quietly eroded.

This is not merely a private tragedy. It is a national concern, touching the very principles upon which Malaysia was founded.

The Rukun Negara, a moral promise not merely a slogan which begins with belief in God and ends with morality and courtesy. Between these pillars lie loyalty, constitutional supremacy, rule of law, and good behaviour.

(Image: iStock)

These principles were never intended to remain abstract ideals. They were meant to be lived first in the family, the smallest and most influential unit of the nation.

When children no longer learn respect at home, no law can manufacture it later. When care for elders weakens in families, social welfare systems are strained. When trust collapses within households, it eventually collapses in institutions.

The weakening of family life is therefore not a cultural footnote—it is a failure to translate national values into daily practice.

The Constitution protects the family, but cannot sustain it alone. The Federal Constitution safeguards marriage, parenthood, equality, and the dignity of the individual. It recognises the family as essential to social stability, but constitutions can only protect frameworks, they cannot cultivate character.

No article of law can teach patience between spouses, no statute can legislate compassion between generations, no court can replace moral education learned at the dining table.

When families weaken, societies turn increasingly to enforcement—policing behaviour rather than nurturing conscience. This is costly, ineffective, and ultimately unsustainable.

One of the defining features of our time is the shift from viewing relationships as covenants of responsibility to contracts of convenience. Marriage becomes conditional on satisfaction. Parenthood is weighed against personal freedom. Elder care is outsourced rather than honoured.

Economic pressures and modern life are often blamed, but hardship alone does not destroy families. What erodes them is the absence of a shared moral vision—a sense that family life is not merely personal, but a public good.

This concern is echoed in global reflections on social development, including the 19 March message of the Universal House of Justice which observes that societies suffer when institutions lose their moral and spiritual foundations and are reduced to instruments of individual interest.

Malaysia rightly upholds rights, but rights, when detached from responsibility, can quietly undermine the very relationships that make freedom meaningful.

A society that emphasises “my choice” without “our duty” risks producing citizens who are legally protected but morally unanchored. The family is where this balance must first be learned—where freedom is guided by care, and authority is tempered by love.

Without this balance, individualism does not lead to dignity—it leads to fragmentation.

(Image: Malay Mail)

Malaysia is a religious nation, yet religiosity does not automatically translate into strong families. When faith becomes an identity marker or political symbol rather than a force for ethical transformation, it loses its power to sustain daily life.

The values proclaimed in public must be practised in private. The sacredness of family is preserved not by slogans, but by virtues of justice, patience, consultation, equality, and service—lived consistently at home.

The family need to be reclaimed as a moral Institution, restoring the sacred place of the family, that does not mean returning to rigid traditions or imposing control. It requires a moral renewal, aligned with the spirit of the Rukun Negara and the Constitution.

Marriage need to be practiced as partnership, not dominance, valuing care work as nation-building labour. Teaching children ethics alongside achievement, treating elders as reservoirs of wisdom, not burdens. The family is the nation’s first school of citizenship. If it fails, no curriculum reform, enforcement mechanism, or policy innovation can fully compensate.

Malaysians need to have a national reflection. The question before Malaysia is not whether families still exist—they do. The question is whether we still see them as sacred trusts essential to our shared future.

If the Rukun Negara is to remain a living covenant and the Constitution a moral compass rather than a legal manual, the family must once again be recognised as the heart of national integrity. When the family weakens, the nation fractures quietly.

When the family is strengthened, the nation heals—patiently, enduringly, and from within. 

K.Tamil Maran ( KT Maran)
Seremban, Negri Sembilan

The views expressed are solely of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of MMKtT. 

 Focus Malaysia.