Q: What did one penny say to the other penny?
A: Let’s get together and make some cents!
Q: Why did the fish cross the sea?
A: To get to the other tide!
Q: What do tree’s drink
A: Root beer!
Santa, standing on a railway platform, suddenly runs and stands on the tracks.
Banta: “Santa, move out of the way! The train is arriving!”
Santa: “Haven’t you heard the announcement that the train is arriving on the platform?”
A little girl and boy are fighting about the differences between the sexes, and which one is better.
Finally, the boy drops his pants and says, “Here’s something I have that you’ll never have!”
The little girl is pretty upset by this, since it is clearly true, and runs home crying.
A while later, she comes running back with a smile on her face.
She drops her pants and says, “My mommy says that with one of these, I can have as many of those as I want!”
Maria went home happy, telling her mother about how she earned RM 20 by climbing a tree.
Her mom responded, “Maria, they just wanted to see your panties!”
Maria replied, “See Mom, I was smart, I took them off!”
There were three men in the desert.
They all wanted something to cool them down.
One brought a pail of water. The second brought an umbrella. The third took out a car door.
The other two said, “Why do you have a car door?”
The person said, “So we could roll the windows down when we get hot!”
A woman walks into a cafe with a stomach ache.
After a while she realizes she needs to relieve herself, knowing her farts are loud, she decides to fart simultaneously with the cafe music. Every time the music gets really loud she let out a long fart.
She saw that everyone in the cafe was staring at her and later realized that she was wearing headsets the whole time…
A: I have the perfect son.
B: Does he smoke?
A: No, he doesn’t.
B: Does he drink liquor?
A: No, he doesn’t.
B: Does he ever come home late?
A: No, he doesn’t.
B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?
A: He will be six months old next Wednesday!
There’s a blonde and a brunette in a car. The brunette is driving while the blonde is in the passenger seat. They’re going down a steep hill when the brunette realizes that the brakes don’t work.
The brunette tells the blonde that the brakes don’t work and they will drive off the side of the cliff because they failed to stop.
The blonde then replies, “Don’t worry! There’s a stop sign ahead!”
At the doctor’s clinic, Tom was getting a check-up. “I have good news and bad news,” says the doctor. “The good news is you have 24 hours left to live.”
Tom replies, “That’s the good news?!”
Then the doctor says, “The bad news is I should have told you that yesterday!”
Paddy and Murphy are having a pint in the pub when some scuba divers come on the TV.
Paddy says, “Murphy, why is it them, deep-sea divers always sit on the side of the boat with their oxygen tanks on their backs, and fall backward out of the boat?”
Murphy thinks for a minute then says, “That’s easy. It’s because if they fell forwards, they’d still be in the blooming boat!”
As usual, we remind you to take your Memo Plus Gold daily. It will help to keep you alert and mentally sharp. For more information or to order for Memo Plus Gold, please visit : https://oze.my
No comments:
Post a Comment
Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.