Time to balik tongsan?

Our writer confesses to having thoughts of leaving his true home, but knows that grass is grass wherever you are.

COMMENT

I have always wondered if I would emigrate one day, set sail for new shores for what may seem like a better life. The grass is always greener on the other side until you get there and realise that grass is grass and the world hasn’t changed all that much.

I must admit that there have been moments when my mind is bent towards going away. At such times, I rationalise the desire with such thoughts as “I’d rather my kids grew up in Australia” or “It doesn’t look like things are going to get any better here” or “I won’t miss my Malay friends that much; there are many Malays in Perth” or even “You’re not wanted here anyway.”

I believe that is the central dilemma for many Malaysian Chinese these days, this idea that we don’t belong in our country. We have too often been told to “balik kampung” or “balik tongsan.” We’ve been told that we’ve made more than enough money and could thus find another country to live in.

But now, with China looking like it’s going to encourage immigration, Malaysian Chinese face a different kind of dilemma – which country do we call home, ultimately?

You see, the People’s Republic is considering implementing an “overseas Chinese card” to attract the Chinese diaspora back to the motherland, in particular to a new township between Meizhou City and Songkou, built for the overseas Chinese community. Along with this card comes temporary identification papers and the rights to make investments, purchase property and acquire education in public institutions. These are benefits that have eluded many immigrants to China due to its strict green card policy.

This news has opened up a can of worms among Chinese Malaysians. After decades of being told to go home, “home” is now saying, “Come back,” at least to skilled workers, anyway. Already, some are mulling the prospect of returning to the motherland to seek their fortunes there. After all, the new township for immigrants is reportedly four times the size of Singapore, features a Southeast Asian cuisine street, and is in a region with a reputed low crime and pollution and where the winter is short. Most of all, there’ll be zero discrimination.

So the question arises: to stay or to go “home”?

After all, how do you call a country “home” when you are regularly told to go away? As someone who is enchanted with life in Malaysia, minus the politics, I’ve had this question weighing heavily on my mind. As much as I want to stay, it’s not likely that the Chinese will ever escape being seen as “the enemy” to a certain segment of the population, and it is hard to justify having children knowing you will have to tell them someday that the world is a mean and cruel place.

To know that I will one day have to sit my children down like my parents once sat me down, to let them know that they will be attacked for being born as they are. That everything they get in life will be from the work of their hands, and that someone will always try to take it away. To tell them that one day, their best friend might not come over for Christmas dinner any more. Or to tell them no matter how hard they study, the chances of them entering a public university are the same as humanity opening a colony on Pluto. These are oppressive thoughts indeed.

But I think I will stay, at least for a while longer, because I want to believe in the people here, because the spirit of muhibbah, which sounds so hollow coming from the mouth of a politician, lies with us, the citizens of this country, and few Malaysians can say they have never had good friends of another race. Really, if there’s one thing to keep anyone here, it’s the people.

Furthermore, I’ve never been a fan of China and its policies. The Chinese government has committed atrocities and crimes against its people that any decent human would find unforgivable, and the deplorable lack of freedom of speech, and indeed, freedom of thought, in China should be enough reason for pause. While it is clear that no country in particular can claim total innocence in all matters, China has always been, for me, a place to view with suspicion, if not to avoid altogether.

Yes, I am aware of the NSC Bill and the Sedition Act. But yesterday, when you tweeted about Najib and how much you hate him, your social media accounts did not get immediately shut down and no Gestapo officer knocked on your door immediately after. Things may be bad, but they are not beyond redeeming.

I want to believe in Malaysia, in the people here. I know no motherland other than this, and I speak no language other than Malay and English. I am Malaysian, and no “ancestral motherland” or claptrap of that sort can change that. There may come a day when even I, and others like me, change our tune, but that day is not here yet. Until then, we’ll uphold the spirit of Merdeka and celebrate the togetherness that marks us all as Malaysians.

Di mana bumi ku pijak, di situ langit ku junjung.