I'm not offended when others eat while I fast

 

My daughter, who is in secondary school, recently came home and said she isn’t allowed to eat in school during Ramadan even when she isn’t fasting (because she is having her period).

We found out that the teachers wanted the Malay students who were not fasting to eat and drink at home and not in school if they weren’t fasting. My daughter and a friend had to go behind the toilets to have a few gulps of water when they were thirsty, which I think is totally ridiculous.

Now, we all already know that Education Minister Fadhlina Sidek has already issued a directive that all canteens in schools must remain open as usual during Ramadan.

Of course, this irked many a Perikatan Nasional politician and they responded by saying that this is disrespectful of Muslims in the country.

In fact, the minister was questioned directly in Parliament by Temerloh MP Salamiah Nor and she answered matter-of-factly.

Education Minister Fadhlina Sidek

Living in a multicultural country, there needs to be acceptance and mutual respect. As much as the PN politicians want Islam and the people who fast to be respected, those who aren’t Muslim and not fasting need to be respected too.

If it isn’t in their religion or culture to fast, then why do they have to be told to eat in places that aren’t meant for eating? We don’t want what happened several years ago to happen again where non-fasting students were made to eat in storerooms and toilets.

The point of fasting

Every time, when I feel that Malaysian society is making some progress and maturing, something will happen to make me think “One step forward and two steps backwards!”. Every year when Ramadan comes, this conversation surfaces again in the public sphere.

Is there any way that the privileged majority in Malaysia can step out of their own little world and try to see things from other people’s perspectives? There are others living in this country too who have different beliefs and practices.

In my 46 years of life, I have never met one single non-Muslim in Malaysia who has ever disrespected me whenever it is Ramadan.

In fact, they go to great lengths to try not to be offensive even when whatever it is they are doing is not disrespectful. They will apologise if they are drinking when I suddenly turn up or even when they start talking about food.

I appreciate it but come on! Eating in front of me while I’m fasting is not a sign of disrespect.

I am the Muslim who has decided to fast and not them. If anything, I need to be more understanding of them and not make them feel uncomfortable eating in front of me. Why should they stop eating or move away just because I’m fasting?

That would be very inconsiderate of me. In fact, there are many times when I join my non-Muslim friends for lunch or tea while I’m fasting just to hang out and chit-chat with them. It’s really no big deal for me.

Look, what kind of Muslim would I be if I couldn’t handle seeing food in front of me or people eating while I was fasting? Especially if I have been fasting for so many Ramadans now, I would be so conditioned to it already.

This is what I try to teach my children too. I want them to realise that fasting should be done sincerely and not forced. I want them to learn that fasting is a form of self-control and discipline to make them better people.

When they fast, they need to go through their day like any other normal day. I mean, there can be some adjustments.

For example, I do my daily 5km runs in the evenings instead of the mornings during Ramadan. I may sit down and rest a little bit more too, but other than that, everything is business as usual.

If not, then what is the point of it, right? Do we just sleep throughout the day while we’re fasting? That would make things a lot easier and eliminate all temptations but even Islam discourages that.

Feeling like a broken record

As for my daughter, who isn’t fasting because it’s that time of the month, I personally don’t see any problems if she wants to eat or drink at the canteen. Who would really be offended? The students who are fasting won’t be there anyway because they are allowed to do other activities in other places such as the hall or classrooms.

So, I told my daughter to speak up to her teachers but she said to me that there was no point. She isn’t bothered anyway because it isn’t really a big deal to her. Good for her.

More importantly, isn’t this the month of Ramadan when we all should be doing good things and having good thoughts? We really shouldn’t be harping on about who is being offensive or not.

Instead, we should put in more effort to teach our children about having understanding and tolerance of one another even when we have different beliefs and cultures. I applaud the minister and the ministry. I just hope the same ideals can trickle down to the schools properly.

I actually feel like a broken record. I pray that one day, we don’t have to talk about this issue again when Ramadan comes. It is really such a waste of time, energy, and headspace.

Happy Ramadan everyone and may everyone, Muslims and non-Muslims, be blessed always. -  Mkini

ZAN AZLEE is a writer, documentary filmmaker, journalist and academic. Visit fatbidin.com to view his work.

The views expressed here are those of the author/contributor and do not necessarily represent the views of MMKtT.