MALAYSIA Tanah Tumpah Darahku


Tuesday, April 23, 2024



Tamparuli Suspension Bridge, Jalan Bontoi, Tamparuli, Sabah, Malaysia.

Two life-long friends were enjoying a few pints down at the local bar, when one said to the other: "If I ask you a question, will you promise to answer me honestly?"
"Yeah, sure thing," replied his friend, "fire away."
"Well," said the first guy, "why do you think all the guys around here find my wife so attractive?"
"It's probably because of her speech impediment," replied the second guy.
"What do you mean her speech impediment?" inquired the first fellow.
"My wife doesn't have a speech impediment!"

"Well," replied his friend, "you must be the only guy who hasn't noticed that she can't say 'NO'!!!"

A woman applying for a job in a Florida lemon grove seemed way too qualified for the job.
Look Miss," said the foreman, "have you any actual experience in picking lemons?"

"Well, as a matter of fact, yes!" she replied. "I've been divorced three times!"

If I had a star for every time my wife brightened my day, I would have had a galaxy in my hand by now! 

After a nice dinner, the two couples got up from the table. The ladies went into the kitchen and the men went into the family room.
One of the gents said to the other, "I think it is so wonderful how you call your wife, "honey pie" and "sweet pea", and "sugar" all the time.

The other gent said, "Well to tell you the truth, four years ago, I forget her name!"

An account executive drove his two young staff to work late one weekend for an important company project. A genie appeared and granted each one wish.
The first asked to be on a yacht in Hawaii and - poof - he was gone.
The second wished to be transported to a Florida beach and - poof - she was away.

The account exec thought briefly about his wish and then said, "I want those two lazy bastards back here, right now!"

A fox shot and killed a 38-year-old hunter in central Yugoslavia, the official Yugoslav news agency Tanjug reported yesterday.
Salih Hajdur, a farmer from the village of Gornje Hrasno in the Republic of Bosnia-Herzegovina, went to a nearby forest on Sunday to shoot a fox, Tanjug said.

Hajdur wounded a fox in the leg, the agency said, but to spare the skin he did not fire again. Instead, he hit the animal with his rifle butt. 

The struggling animal triggered a shot that hit Hajdur in the chest and killed him instantly, Tanjug reported. The fox died later; Tanjug added.

Guess what I am wearing? 

The smile my wife gave me! 

A man came home from an exhausting day at work, plopped down on the couch in front of the television, and told his wife: "Get me a beer before it starts!"
The wife sighed and got him a beer.
Ten minutes later, he said: "Get me another beer before it starts!"
She looked cross, but fetched another beer and slammed it down next to him. He finished that beer and a few minutes later said: "Quick, get me another beer, it's going to start any minute!"
The wife was furious. "Is that all you're going to do tonight! Drink beer and sit in front of that TV! You're nothing but a lazy, drunken, fat slob and furthermore..."
The man sighed and said: "It's started!"

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