PATIENCE

 

Patience is a virtue, and there is a reason - it is a tough skill to master.

Imagine, for instance, that you are waiting for someone to finish compiling a report that you need for a meeting. You are already late, you can feel your body getting tense, and you are starting to get angry. Suddenly, you lose your temper and yell at the person for putting you behind schedule. You can tell that they are shocked and upset by your outburst, but you cannot help it.

What Is Patience?

Patience is the ability to stay calm while you are waiting for an outcome that you need or want. It comes in three main varieties: interpersonal patience, life hardship patience, and daily hassles patience.

Let us look at these in more detail:

1. Interpersonal Patience

Interpersonal patience is patience with other people, their demands and their failings.  You may consider some people to be slow learners, hard to understand, or even downright unreasonable. Or, they may have bad habits that drive you crazy. But losing your patience with them will be of no benefit, and it may make matters worse. Patience and understanding toward others are essential when you are onboarding new staff, or when you are delegating tasks. It is also a huge help in dealing with difficult co-workers or managers, and it is central to high-quality customer service. This type of patience is active. Listening skills and empathy are vital, and, when you are dealing with difficult people, you need the self-awareness and emotional intelligence to understand how your words and actions affect the situation. You cannot just wait it out and hope for the best. 

2. Life Hardship Patience

We could use the term perseverance to sum up life hardship patience. It can mean having the patience to overcome a serious setback in life, like waiting long term for the outcome of a lawsuit, or for medical treatment. But it can also include your ability to work toward a long-term goal - whether it is professional, such as a promotion, or personal, like getting fit or saving for a vacation. Whatever the obstacle you have to overcome, it will likely require determination and focus to achieve. And you will need to keep your emotions under control throughout the journey. These emotions can range from eagerness to get it done, to anger at the frustrations you encounter along the way - which can cause you to become demotivated. 

3. Daily Hassles Patience

Sometimes you need patience to deal with circumstances that are beyond your control. These are your "life hassles." Something as trivial as getting stuck in a traffic line, for instance, or waiting for a computer program to load. You also need patience to get through those dull but unavoidable day-to-day tasks that do not necessarily contribute to your personal goals. The ability to maintain self-discipline, and during the course of your work - no matter how mundane - the attention to detail it needs, is a hallmark of patience. 

The Benefits and Risks of Patience

In general, being patient means that you are more likely viewed positively by your co-workers and managers (and your family and friends). You will likely be a better team worker, and be more focused and productive.

If you are often impatient, people may see you as arrogant, insensitive and impulsive. Co-workers may think that you are a poor decision maker, because you make snap judgments or interrupt people. If you get a reputation for having poor people skills and a bad temper, others may even deliberately avoid working with you. As a result, not surprisingly, impatient people will unlikely be top of the list for promotion.

Of course, being patient does not mean you should be a "pushover." Far from it. Sometimes it is fine to show your displeasure when people keep you waiting unnecessarily. So, ensure that you establish strong boundaries. But, be sure that you are polite and assertive, never angry and aggressive.

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