Anwar should just bear with Mahathir

 

All children, sons especially, would like to have a great relationship with their father.

A father is someone whom a son seeks to emulate when he becomes a man himself.

When a son becomes a man, one of his great desires would be to hear his father proudly say: “My son has become the man I myself have always wanted to be. He is the accomplishment of my dream, the fulfilment of my desires.”

To hear such words coming from one’s father would make any man feel he has succeeded in life!

However, not many relationships are destined to end with such bliss.

For that to happen, fathers must first stop pursuing their own dreams.

The paradox of the father-son relationship is that, for a son to emulate his father, the son may first have to topple his father.

In Greek mythology, Cronus had to overthrow his father, Uranus to become leader of the Titans. Cronus’ own son, Zeus, would later overthrow him to become the new leader of the Greek Gods.

Even the ancient Greeks who lived over 3,000 years ago knew that fathers do not always willingly hand over the torch to their sons and go gently into the night.

To become the man he aspires to be, a son often must seize the torch from his father forcibly and cast him into oblivion. Such is the tragedy of human experience!

Anwar has said that Mahathir is like a father to him.

Although Mahathir may never say it, of all the politicians he has schooled, in terms of energy, daring, drive and vitality, he surely sees himself most in Anwar. That would make Anwar like a son to Mahathir.

Whether Mahathir likes what he presently sees is another matter.

In any case, between them recently, “father” has been fiercely critical of “son”.

First, Mahathir said the Malays were losing power under Anwar. Then he claimed that since stepping down as prime minister, the Malays have lost everything.

He also recently called Anwar a dictator, which oddly enough, is what many people called him when he was in charge.

Now, Mahathir is even threatening to sue if Anwar does not retract what he had said about him in a speech recently.

As sad as the entire episode is, this is actually a common phenomenon that happens between parent and child.

Elderly parents tend to find fault regularly with their grown-up children to delay handing over the torch.

Grown-up children then learn to ignore their parents’ criticism to go about the business of leading and providing for their family.

Sometimes, to up the ante, an elderly person might even go around the neighbourhood or to relatives to complain about their children. The children, in turn, quite often retaliate in some form or other to stop the shaming.

Like it or not, this is something that happens in most families.

Some people, like Nazri Aziz, are suggesting that Anwar use the Sedition Act to tame Mahathir.

Even now, Mahathir might welcome the prospect. The old tiger is always ready for a scrap, it seems.

For Anwar to act punitively against Mahathir is also not without precedent.

History is littered with incidents of patricide, filicide and fratricide amongst the ruling classes.

Amongst the Ottoman Turks, for example, when a new sultan ascends the throne, all his brothers will be ritually strangled with a silk cord. That practice would gradually give way to a lifetime of solitary confinement.

In some ways, we can see similarities between the practices of the ruling classes in Malaysia and latter-day practices of the Ottoman Turks.

During Mahathir’s and Najib’s reigns, Anwar was cast into “solitary confinement”. Najib in turn was cast into “solitary confinement” during Ismail Sabri Yaakob’s reign. Now, under Anwar, Muhyiddin Yassin’s liberty is at risk.

Regardless, it would not be out of place to say that by Malaysian standards, this is not the ideal way to resolve a dispute between an elderly parent and a grown up child.

No, in this country, the preferred way would be to just silently bear with the difficulties our parents may cause us late in their lives.

What Malaysians should tell Anwar as Mahathir relentlessly goes about making things difficult for him is that we understand.

He does not have to expend so much effort defending himself against Mahathir’s complaints and accusations, because we know ourselves what having a difficult elderly “parent” entails.

All Anwar needs to do is be patient and silently bear the struggles, consoled by the knowledge that everybody else understands and sympathises with him.

Quite often, that consolation is good enough. - FMT

The views expressed are those of the writer and do not necessarily reflect those of MMKtT.