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Friday, April 21, 2023

PERSONAL STABILITY

 


The world around us is in turmoil right now. Each day brings a fresh deluge of awful news, and it seems like the world as we know it is coming apart at the seams. Everywhere you look right now, the story is the same: your colleagues and friends have said they feel like they are not doing enough, while everything seems to be taking twice as long to do. Fear, uncertainty and doubt are clouding up our perceptions, and moving forward feels like moving through molasses.

Whether you are reacting to the current political, economic and health climate, or you are just trying to get through life with a pushy parent, a stressful job, a sick loved one or any of life’s other major stressors, there is not an overnight fix. When things around you have gone haywire, the last thing you might think to do - and the most important - is to give yourself some foundation to stand on.

Here are some ideas to get you started:-

Get into nature.

Nature provides a different perspective. The trees, oceans, mountains and lakes have been here long before we were here and they will be here long after we are gone. Plus, fresh air is good for you. Whether you wander into the woods near your house or just spend a few minutes on a park bench, a little time in nature, away from the concerns of people, might be just the thing you need. Watch some bugs, feel the breeze and take comfort that there’s an entire world that has nothing to do with human concerns - and you already live in it.

Renegotiate your relationship with the social media.

You would not go to a party filled with people you did not want to see. Why should social media be any different? Unfollow, unfriend or block people who leave you feeling unsettled after you interact with them. Hide news sources that overstimulate your emotions in order to get you to click. Cut back on how much time you spend on Facebook and Twitter and consider taking up an offline habit to replace them with. Unfollow anyone you are comparing yourself to on Instagram and start following things that inspire you instead. 

Call a friend.

Call someone you love. Reconnect with someone from your past. Have a conversation with someone whose opinion you respect. Pick up the phone and call them. If you have phone anxiety, try scheduling a phone date ahead of time or using Skype so you can see them. Ask questions about how it is going. Be curious. Talk about what they are seeing, what they are noticing, what matters to them. 

Move your body.

It is easy to take the weight of the world onto your shoulders, so take a couple of minutes to move around. You could do a full-blown workout but just a minute or two of stretching can go a long way to making you feel like maybe you are going to be okay after all. 

Get more sleep.

Go to bed at a reasonable hour. Take naps. Let yourself unwind away from the screens for an hour or two before bed. Keep the stressful stuff out of the bedroom. 

Take care of someone (or something) else.

One of the best ways to get out of your own head is to put your attention on someone or something else. Now might be the time to make your garden extra nice or to adopt a pet. Show up for a sick friend, or start doing that volunteer work you have been thinking about for a while.

Look for good news.

You should not pretend that everything is all rosy or that you should ignore that awful things that are happening. But it is easy to get disheartened or to think that efforts at protest and pushback are not working if you do not acknowledge them when they do. So, pay attention when there is a small victory. Collect bits of good news as though they are balloons and let them lift you up when you need it.

Say "Thank You".

“Thank you” is an interpersonal form of gratitude, and it can really make someone’s day. Make a point to thank the people around you who make your life better. A heartfelt “thanks” can make you feel connecting to others and remind you that everything is not all bad, and basic things are still working.

Meditate.

Many people are using online applications right now to get a grip on things, and it seems to be working. So, if meditation is your thing and if you think it helps, then check it out. If, on the other hand, you prefer less traditional ways of meditating, try colouring or playing with boxes of sand. 

Let yourself rest.

It can be tempting to try to stay up-to-date and current, but being emotionally keyed up is not the same thing as taking action to make a change. When you are wound up and cannot seem to get a grip, it is time to rest. Try to a 24-hour media break over the weekends. Let your time be filled with companionable silence instead of trying to understand what is happening around you.

Prioritize Pleasure and Joy.

Remember your senses and tend to them. Run your fingers through wet grass. Inhale the scent of the flowers that are starting to bloom. Snuggle up with a loved one even though your mind is racing. Play games with your kids. Watch a comedy. Lose yourself in a good book. Make art that makes you feel good. Make your favourite meal and dine by candlelight. Learn a new skill. Do not let these things be taken from you. They are what make you feel alive, no matter what is going on around you.

Developing practices to keep you focused and grounded will help you get through the hard stuff, whether it is the fresh hell of daily “news” or the pile of pain that life has a habit of throwing your way sometimes.

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