JUST EMPHASISING A POINT

When I first came to the UK in 2009 I admit I was rather shocked when on BBC TV or Sky TV they would freely allow comments such as ‘Jesus Forking Christ’. I told my wife, “What the hell! Is that not blasphemous? Wow!” 

NO HOLDS BARRED

Raja Petra Kamarudin

I am also expressing some points that I feel about our bloggers who by far and large have been far more constructive than the political elite in awakening the conscience of the citizen must emphasise their concerns and points with a greater eloquence. It is distasteful when one finds a generous spread of four letter words. Now with regard to language I have challenged persons in this manner if one feels that if the language one uses in print or verbal dialogues is of an acceptable standard. Then one should have the sterling courage without the fear reprisals in using such language in the presence of one’s respective place of worship, a Monarch, a Judge, a Court, on TV interviews, in the presence of one’s family, elders and little children. If one will not use it in any of the stated environments mentioned, one should not use it.

Though I disagree with RPK on his language and his comments on Malays, Muslims and other ethnic or religious groups. I have respect and esteem for his views and cringe at the language or the brutality of the response, though a bit crass they are unpretentious and filled with integrity. It is RPK’s articles mainly that enable me state opinions about bloggers. In some ways I do feel like a rotten heel writing in relation to him, as he is one of those rare individuals who with his family has suffered for a cause in excess of his life and is deprived of his homeland as a consequence.

Nevertheless I feel that we should always find a better or a kinder way to articulate our views without placing offense on the party that is challenging us. One should never attach a race or religion just because of some dysfunctional government policies. There will always be the individuals who chose to be antagonistic provocateurs when they place comments that demean simple intelligence on a blog site – I sincerely appeal and hope that bloggers would never use the power of their well honed skills in language, writing and knowledge to embarrass or insult the persons who disagree with their writings.

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That was the last three paragraphs of Dominic Damian’s letter to Free Malaysia Today. It is quite an interesting and enlightening observation, and one that I would not disagree with. I thought that since the last three paragraphs make a reference to me maybe I should respond in some way.

The bone of contention that Dominic raises is my penchant for using four-letter words. Yes, that four-letter word that starts with ‘F’ and ends with ‘K’, FORK. I admit that over the last five years or so my language has been reduced to gutter-level, as how some would probably view it.

I am not sure how that happened. One reason could be that after 20 years since 1994 (when I first started writing and publishing my articles on the Internet) of trying to deliver my message, and still not being able to get through the thick heads of Malaysians, I no longer have the patience of being nice and diplomatic. Hence maybe I am subconsciously feeling that it is time to be brutal and abrasive.

I mean, if nice does not do it, how about trying with un-nice, if you know what I mean?

Second could be that over the last five years since 2009 I have been living in Manchester and hence have now become more Mancunian than Malaysian. And the Mancunian language is very colourful, to put it mildly. Hence the Mancunian way of speaking has rubbed off on me.

In fact, Mancunians are not really as bad as the Scousers or Liverpudlians of Liverpool. In the North West, the Liverpudlians are considered more ‘rough’. Try wearing a MU shirt and walk into a Liverpool pub and see what will happen to you. Well, I suppose in certain parts of Manchester you would also be having a death wish if you wear a Liverpool FC shirt and walk into a pub.

When I first came to the UK in 2009 I admit I was rather shocked when on BBC TV or Sky TV they would freely allow comments such as ‘Jesus Forking Christ’. I told my wife, “What the hell! Is that not blasphemous? Wow!”

After awhile I no longer missed a heartbeat when every other day I would hear ‘Jesus Forking Christ’ on TV. It was quite normal and acceptable in this part of the world.

That most obnoxious and offensive four-letter word no longer means what it used to mean (copulation or sexual intercourse). It is no longer a verb (the act of doing something). It is now used to emphasis certain adjectives (a describing word). And I have even seen people use this word in front of their dog, would you believe it?

For example, someone would come to Gossip on Broadway and order a Tom Yam and after one sip would say, “This Tom Yam is forking good. It is even better than the one I had in Bangkok.”

This person is just demonstrating his surprise and appreciation. He never thought he could find better Tom Yam outside Thailand, especially not in Manchester. And, to this person, to say that the Tom Yam is good does not do justice to what he regards as the best Tom Yam he has ever tasted. He needs to show his wonderful surprise and deepest appreciation by saying that the Tom Yam is forking good.

This in no way means he wants to have sex with that bowl of Tom Yam.

The word ‘fork’ is now used in all sorts of situations that have no reference to sex in any way whatsoever.

When we are shocked and surprised regarding the soon-to-be-held Kajang by-election we might say, “What the fork?” or “What the fork is PKR trying to do?” Again, no sex is involved here, although if we add, “The people are being forked good and proper by PKR”, that could have a reference to sex.

There are actually many ways the word ‘fork’ is used to emphasis the severity of the action.

You say, “Don’t fork with me”, which is a more serious warning then “Don’t mess with me” or “Don’t play me out” or “Don’t make a fool of me” or “Don’t cheat me” and so on.

When a chap is in serious trouble (like his wife caught him in bed with another man), saying “You are in serious trouble” would be too mild. Instead, you will say, “You are in deep shit” or “Your goose is cooked” or “You are sunk” or “You are dead” or “You are history”, etc. However, that does not even begin to describe the trouble you are in as by saying “You are forked big time”.

Hence the word ‘fork’ is not always a bad word unless you use it in the context of sexual intercourse or copulation. Then that would be crude, offensive and obnoxious. By using it in another context, it actually helps deliver your message more clearly with no confusion or misconception as to what you really mean.

You can say “Goodness gracious” or “Dear me” or “Oh dear” or “Alamak” or “What the hell” or “My God” or “Bloody hell” or “Forking hell” and so on. But when you say, “Jesus Forking Christ”, everyone knows that that is the ultimate of shock and awe.