Why can't we visit our parents?

 

Azizul visited the Sungai Buloh police station this morning, hoping to get a permit to cross state lines and visit his elderly parents in Prai, Penang. He prepared two copies of his permit application form, his identity card and the vaccination e-certificates of himself and both his parents. 

It has been almost 20 months since he last met his parents. He was hopeful in explaining to the police the urgency for him to return home to check on them. They have been alone at home for the longest time and are beginning to display signs of depression.

Azizul planned to spend three weeks with them. As a single man in his forties, he was able to make time for them – something he thought he should have done months ago. While checking on them and observing their mental and physical wellbeing, he could still continue to work from home. It was a good plan and a safe one, so he thought.

The police officers at the station didn’t take long to consider his application before turning it down. The rules were clear, they stated, Azizul’s justification to cross the border did not fall under the 'urgent' category.

Azizul was informed that for him to be permitted for interstate travel to see his parents, he must bring additional evidence such as a letter from a hospital stating that they are unwell and in need of care. Otherwise, Azizul will not be granted the permit. 

In other words, in order for Azizul to obtain the permit, his parents must be suffering from a serious illness.

Married couples can cross state lines

A few of weeks ago, as part of the government’s plan to ease standard operating procedures (SOPs) for social activities for those fully vaccinated, married couples living apart were allowed to cross district or state lines once a week to spend time together. 

This regular visitation allowance was permitted because apparently, the government understood the 'need' for spouses to ease their longing for each other or best said in Malay ‘melepaskan kerinduan’.

I find it odd, while the government takes into consideration the longing of two individuals of the opposite gender who may only have spent a few years together after tying the knot, it seems to be neglecting the one true relationship that every human being on Earth has in common – a parent-child relationship.

How can anyone with a decent level of intelligence give greater leeway to two individuals in a relationship based on contract and libido while denying access to individuals in a relationship based on blood and love?

It beats me.

Easing the longing

Upon hearing Azizul’s story, I decided to call the Sungai Buloh police station. I wanted to know the procedures for married couples who wish to cross state lines to 'ease their longing for each other'.

The officer politely replied, almost as if he could understand the difficulties of keeping marital couples apart. He assured me that the process was simple. With the needed documents (both copies of identity cards, vaccination e-certificates, marriage certificate and proof of address), a permit would be granted with no other questions asked.

After thanking the officer, I asked his permission to query on behalf of a friend who wishes to visit his elderly parents. I explained that the parents were unwell and living alone, and how their only son who had not seen them for more than one and a half years would like to check on them.

“What documents should my friend prepare in order to apply for the permit to cross state lines to visit his parents?” I asked.

“Itu ikut budi bicara pegawai, puan. Kalau pegawai rasa nak bagi, dia bagi lah. Kalau tak, jawabnya tak dapat lah (That is at the discretion of the officer, ma'am. If the officer wishes to give a permit, then he gives it. If he rejects it, then that’s it),” he replied.

The police officer’s reply did not come as a shock to me. With unclear regulations and half-baked SOPs set by the government, even the police are left to make decisions based on their own discretion. Sigh.

To all the Azizuls out there who are missing their parents and worried about their wellbeing, my heart goes out to you. Let us pray that our ministers will be smarter so we, the rakyat, don’t have to put up with these half-baked SOPs for much longer. - Mkini

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FA ABDUL is a passionate storyteller, a media trainer, an aspiring playwright, a director, a struggling producer, a photographer, an expert Facebooker, a lazy blogger, a part-time queen and a full-time vainpot.

The views expressed here are those of the author/contributor and do not necessarily represent the views of MMKtT.