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Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Why I almost choked on my pizza


Fidus Achates

EDITOR'S PICK Some time back, I can’t remember the exact date, when Anwar Ibrahim announced that Zaid Ibrahim had joined the party, I almost choked on my last piece of home-made pizza. There he goes again, blindsided by profuse pledges of personal admiration and loyalty. That’s his fatal flaw – he’s really got it up to there in terms of everything that a man would need but he sucks when it comes to judging people.

These are people that he had pinned such high hopes on – no need to go through the rouges gallery of backstabbers and turncoats for they are household toilet names. In fact to say that Anwar is a poor judge of character is really as understated as saying that Najib is a read-my-pink-lips incorrigible liar. (Was it some Freudian slip that got Liow Tiong Lai to proclaim to the world that Najib is now in the pink of health?)

But I stray because this is not about Anwar and certainly not about some faraway land south of Siberia – oops, another slip!) It’s about celebrating the overdue demise of PKR’s bête noire. It’s about why I believe that this episode is good for the party, for the leaders down the line and for Pakatan and the people.

And why it’s bad news for the likes of those who though they are not party members behave like they own the party. Their presumptuousness and overbearing sense of self-righteousness is only matched by their arrogance and self-induced delusions of grandeur. They have never been tested at all on the ground but they hum and haw as if the people will sing to their glory with just a snap of their fingers.

Zaid - Mr Bellyache himself?
More than anyone else, it’s about Mr. Bellyache himself, the Don Corleone of the Colic-prone Mafia, which without more, is not such a big deal. But the fact is that it all doesn’t add up and when we put the dots together we realize that it’s not only Anwar who has been humbugged but a couple of thousand members of PKR too. How could we not see through the vainglorious design? Wasn’t that a dagger on the wall all this while but were we so dazzled by the sound bites and sophisticated lighting that no shadows were cast?

And this dagger has nothing to do with his personal history. If the man says he’s repentant of his wayward lifestyle of the past, we have to take his word for it. But if he says he stands and fights for justice and not office, then his actions must measure up to his words. Or else they belie self-serving motives.

The inconsistencies and contradictions are now finally surfacing for those who care to find out but a quick trajectory will show up the scheming – he leaves UMNO under circumstances which showed clearly that he had lost his political legitimacy (admittedly that’s an oxymoron when one talks about UMNO) even in his home base in Kota Baru; but not until he’s enjoyed the executive power of being a cabinet minister.

While still in the party and more importantly in the government, he behaved in exactly the same fashion as those amphibians in PKR preparing their jump over the other side of the fence. The only difference is that those four-legged Olympian hoppers from PKR were as broke as church mice while Zaid had very deep pockets.

And as they say, with money you can turn a turbaned Taliban would-be-suicide bomber into the baddest hip-hop artist who could make Kanye West look like he’s just starting to vocalize. The point is that money was not an issue – which is to say that he could dole out the mazumah if it served his purpose.

I make no insinuation here whether or not he did but to suggest that he sacrificed so much material comfort by leaving UMNO seriously warrants a reality check. Fact was he was going to be dumped anyway once Najib took over. What loss?

It was a major coup, well conceptualized and executed. And who better to break the news than Anwar himself – news as I’d said almost choked me to death but for the swift action of my youngest daughter who for once in her life was able to rain thundering blows on my back and be praised for it!

Seriously, why go for the by-election if you’re not keen to hold positions of power? You were given the Pakatan coordinator’s job (a role your phantom supporters have been touting ad nauseam) so why were you so hell-bent on vying for the Deputy’s post? (I say phantom because there is a perception of widespread support especially in the blogosphere where cyber troopers rule the roost but yet when push comes to shove we don’t see your minions in person. Where are these people who seem to be cheering you on? Are they living in some dungeon?) Prior to being given the ticket to stand for the by-election, you’d gone into a bitch fit about wanting a leave of absence – but mysteriously reappeared when it was clear nobody noticed your absence.

So, let’s be thankful that the tide in the affairs of PKR has reached a high point, not the highest yet, but certainly high enough that we, not just PKR but all of Pakatan, must take the current when it serves.

No more pussyfooting, no more kid gloves, no more Obama-like bipartisan inclusiveness. The personal bellyaching proved hemorrhagic for the party causing major internal bleeding. Now that it has decided to make itself scarce, go for the full Monty and rid the party of all these Trojan horses before they start gnawing at our sides again.

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