Time To Abolish Kursus Kahwin

Someone asked me to comment about this issue. Sorry a little late. This is from The Star here 

• Over 33,000 couples split up in 2010 
• ..steady increase in the number of divorces over a 10-year period
• report showed that 0.22% of marriages among Malaysians aged from 18-50 ended in divorce in 2010
• double the 0.13% recorded in 2000.
• 80% of the divorces involved Muslim couples.
• based on figures from (Jakim) and (NRD).
• 33,788 divorces as opposed to 207,553 marriages registered in 2010.
• notable increase from 26,432 divorces and 194,240 marriages recorded in 2008.

I think there is some Gomen bullshit here. 

First of all the arithmetic is tak betul. The report says 0.22% of marriages (ages 18-50) ended in divorce in 2010. OK. That is less than half a percent. Very good.

Tapi, if we check the calculation :  33,788 divorces / 207,553 marriages x 100% = 16.2% divorce rate in 2010.

In 2008 it was 26,432 divorces / 194,240 marriages x 100% = 13.6% divorce rate.  

Isnt this very high?  16.2 out of every 100 marriages will end up in divorce.  Membazir betul lah all that khenduri kahwin. 

For comparison  the Top 10 divorce rates in the world belong to these countries :

Rank	Countries	Amount
# 1	United States:	4.95 per 1,000 people
# 2	Puerto Rico:	4.47 per 1,000 people
# 3	Russia:	3.36 per 1,000 people
# 4	United Kingdom:	3.08 per 1,000 people
# 5	Denmark:	2.81 per 1,000 people
# 6	New Zealand:	2.63 per 1,000 people
# 7	Australia:	2.52 per 1,000 people
# 8	Canada:	2.46 per 1,000 people
# 9	Finland:	1.85 per 1,000 people
# 10	Barbados:	1.21 per 1,000 people

I got this chart from this site.  Do check it out.

Well the figures above are 'per 1000 people. It is not apples and apples. The US has a population of over 250 million people.  

Coming back to Malaysia, it is obvious that we are having a serious divorce rate problem, especially among the Muslims (read as Malays - dont forget everything is racial ok).

The Gomen report says 80% of divorces are among Malays. Even if Malays / Muslims make up 65% of the population, it would seem that the Muslims are punching above their weight in the divorce courts.  (65% of population but 80% of divorces).

At the same time, the non Muslims who make up 35% of our population produce only 20% of  divorces.  The non Muslims are punching below their weight category.  (35% of population but 20% of divorces).

But the non Muslims dont attend 'kursus kahwin'.  The Muslims must attend 'kursus kahwin'. Obviously the kursus kahwin is NOT working.  

Why do I say this? Because the  Gomen report says  "steady increase in the number of divorces over a 10-year period".

I told you folks - the kursus kahwin is just a time wasting, money making scam.  No money no religion. 

Maybe some of you will not agree. Maybe some of you will have a suggestion. Maybe you will suggest that to reduce the divorce rate among Muslims, why not extend the kursus kahwin to say 4 years? Make it like a degree course. Maybe if the kursus kahwin is extended to degree level, then we can reduce the Muslim divorce rate to match the non Muslims.  

Some of you might say that four years is too long.  Ok how about a three year kursus kahwin? Diploma level only.   Some of you might say that it should not be reduced any further - no two years or one year "Certificate Level".  A one year or two year Certificate Level "kursus kahwin" is not going to help reduce the Muslim divorce rate at all.

And for those of you who think that a dua hari atau tiga hari kursus kahwin (where you can pay RM80/= to lulus)  is going to decrease the divorce rate among Muslims, well you better go and take a cold shower.  The "kursus kahwin tiga hari" is not working.  

Why? Because 80% of divorces in Malaysia are Muslim divorces. And the Gomen says there is a "steady increase in the number of divorces over a 10-year period".

Here are some suggestions which may help lower the Muslim divorce rate :

i.   postpone looking for a second wife indefinitely

ii. if you insist on a second wife,  wait a few years AFTER the first wife has died (preferably of natural causes).

iii. if you are looking for the third wife, please make sure you have permanent membership in Al Arqam.

iv.  get a real job to support a wife and a family - one wife and one family at a time

v.   spend time with the wife and family - it is called marriage

vi.  if you are married, avoid ibu tunggal and dara tua - no matter how ugly the situation

Try to qualify for Father's Day (which is tomorrow). This means you must have children who feel motivated to sayang you. They will buy you presents, smuggle durians for you, buy cigars for you and other stuff like that. 

These are just some suggestions.