BULLYING IN SCHOOLS

 

Bullying in school is costly to everyone. Victims are traumatized. Bullies may become more anti-social over time. And bystanders are affected too. Living in a community that tolerates bullying is stressful, and it might make it harder for children to learn.

Unless your child tells you about bullying - or has visible bruises or injuries - it can be difficult to figure out if it is happening. But there are some warning signs. Parents might notice kids acting differently or seeming anxious, or not eating, sleeping well, or doing the things they usually enjoy. When kids seem moodier or more easily upset than usual, or when they start avoiding certain situations (like taking the bus to school), it might be because of a bully.

If you suspect bullying but your child is reluctant to open up, find opportunities to bring up the issue in a more roundabout way. For instance, you might see a similar situation on a television show and use it as a conversation starter by asking, "What do you think of this?" or "What do you think that person should have done?" This might lead to questions like: "Have you ever seen this happen?" or "Have you ever experienced this?" You might want to talk about any experiences you or another family member had at that age.

Let your kids know that if they are being bullied or harassed - or see it happening to someone else, it is important to talk to someone about it, whether it is you, another adult (a teacher or family friend), or a sibling.

A Canadian study suggested that bullies like to play to an audience. In fact, this may be key to their motivation. Bystanders encourage bullying when they observe without protest. And kids are not the only bystanders who witness bullying in school. When teachers, parents, and other adults stand by without intervening, they are passively supporting the bullies.

Such observations inspired researchers to develop a school-based anti-bullying program designed to change the way both bullies and bystanders behave. Called CAPSLE, (Creating A Peaceful School Learning Environment), the program helped the kids become “gentle warriors,” people who are courageous, friendly, helpful, respectful, and show self-control. The programme incorporated these elements:

Creating a positive climate in the classroom, and teaching zero-tolerance both for bullying and for standing by during violent acts.

This is accomplished through many "consciousness-raising" tactics, like giving school-wide recognition to kids who act "heroically" (e.g., by intervening on behalf of a victim), and displaying a "peace banner" outside each classroom. In addition, parents are offered workshops for using positive discipline.

Training teachers in classroom management and the use of positive discipline.

Teachers are taught concrete tactics of positive discipline. The emphasis is on reinforcing desirable behaviour, rather than punishing disruptive behaviour. When teachers observe aggressive behaviour, they intervene promptly, following a progressive discipline plan that avoids drastic punishments and shaming.

A physical education plan designed to teach kids how to control their impulses and take specific action against bullies.

Students receive martial arts training that emphasizes anger management, self-control, and role-playing to learn concrete methods to de-escalate conflicts.

A mentoring program designed to teach kids to avoid involvement in bullying.

Community volunteers patrol school corridors and playgrounds, monitoring children, and acting as mediators. They enter into games with kids (during recess) and actively coach kids in conflict resolution.

As usual, we remind you to take your Memo Plus Gold daily. It will help to keep you alert and mentally sharp. For more information or to order for Memo Plus Gold, please visit : https://oze.my.