What do I tell my sons?

In the past few years, many have lamented that Malaysia is veering from its moderate path to the far right, whose voices seem to dominate the political discourse. Lawyer Alex De Silva is one of them, and his letter to The Malaysian Insider today captures the growing sentiment of right minded Malaysians asking simple questions: Where is this country headed? And do my children have a future here?

I have three sons. They are 18, 16 and 12.

Soon the eldest, if he continues to achieve what he has thus far promised to, will be going to university.

Like most Malaysians my age, who are in the wrong end of the 40s, I think of the future of my sons and in particular of providing them with a good education.

For most of us Malaysians who are not Bumiputera, we will not be able to send our kids to local universities because of quotas and the fact that the preferred courses are simply out of reach.

Some of us, whether Bumiputera or not, may not even want to send our kids to local universities in the believe that foreign universities, together with the experience of studying overseas, would produce a better “whole” person.

Some of these reasons are valid. Others debatable. However, the bottom-line is that if we want to educate our kids, then sending them overseas or a combined “twinning” programme at a private college is the most realistic option.

Leaving aside the rights and wrongs and why Malaysians send their children overseas, the fact of the matter is many Malaysians do send their children overseas to study.

Inevitably when children are sent overseas, questions are asked of the parents, “Have you told your kid not to come back?" or “Have you told your kid to find a job, get experience and maybe settle down where they are?”

Then there are comments such as: “No point coming back. Better stay there and make a living and live there” and “The grass is actually greener the other side. No need to come back.”

When asked whether I would encourage or even tell my kids, if I do send them overseas to study, not to come back and stay wherever they go, I always answered that it is up to them. I shall not tell them what to do. Let them decide.

However, deep down in me I always hoped that my boys would come back to Malaysia.

Some of the reasons were selfish. I wanted them back where I would be, back home in Malaysia. Close to me. However, there were also very “objective” compelling reasons. Malaysia is a great country with great people, weather and food. After all, I have been to and visited many countries which are absolutely great to holiday in but not to live forever.

I was one of those who believed that there was nothing like living in Malaysia even with Ibrahim Ali and Perkasa.

Malaysia was home and was a great place to live. Simple.

This believe and thinking that I would always encourage and even “arm twist” or “persuade” my sons to come back to Malaysia, if they went overseas to study, was deeply ingrained in me. I truly believed so.

I was unwavering despite the dismantling of institutions; the interference with the judiciary in 1998; the wanton amendments to the Federal Constitution to suit the powers that be ; Operasi Lalang; Teoh Beng Hock; police brutality; Anwar’s trials; Perkasa; grown men shaking their butts in front of the former Malaysian Bar president’s house; a compliant media; RPK changing camps; the constituting of numerous Royal Commissions and doing nothing thereafter; PKR’s “Kajang move”.

Then, Karpal Singh died in a terrible tragic accident.

Things suddenly changed.

I did not personally know Karpal. I met him several times in my capacity as a lawyer. However, when I heard of his death, I was moved more than I had expected.

I shall not repeat the tributes and accolades that have been suitably issued in the great man’s name.  There were many and there will, definitely, be many more.

Simply put Karpal was a great man. He fought for justice. He stood his ground and for principles that many Malaysians believed in but did not have the courage to speak out for. He was the voice of many Malaysians. He fought for Malaysia.

Just because he was on the other side of the fence of government did not at all mean Karpal did not love and fight for this country.

However, some politicians thought it wise to use Karpal’s untimely death as a platform to further their own cause. These politicians used the social media to mock Karpal and what he stood for and use his death as material for jibes against him. 

The background for the jibes was Karpal’s stand against the imposition of hudud laws in this country. The jibes and mocking was effectively meant as a message that if you take a stand that is in any way perceived to be against Islam, you will face the wrath of God. You die.

This got me thinking as to why these politicians would write and publish material that was clearly insulting and hurtful of a fellow human being who was revered by so many and who had just met a tragic end.

Clearly, they thought that they would become more popular. They obviously believed that they had enough people to support them. They thought that they would gain political mileage. They clearly were of the view that they were speaking for the people whom they represented.

They believed they were the mouthpiece of the people or at least some of the people in the political party they belonged to and people to whom they appealed to. The comments on the social media were written by people who clearly believed that religious and racial extremism is the way to go to gain popularity.

This must be the case. Otherwise, these politicians would not have had the temerity to say these terrible things.

That, unfortunately, is the only logical explanation.

The statements were hurtful, loaded with extremist views and simply crude. The statements in the social media completely lacked simple human decency and respect for a fellow human being. Let alone a great man who clearly loved and fought for Malaysia.

One of the politicians apologised. One did not.

However, more telling is that the politicians were not publicly reprimanded or taken to task by their political masters. These are the same political masters who jump at the opportunity of using the Sedition Act and other instruments available to silence any dissent.

The impression given is that there is tacit approval of the comments made by these politicians or that there is fear of backlash from the extremist wing if any action is taken against these persons. 

Hence the insolent comments and the refusal to even attempt an apology by one of the politicians concerned.

This is terribly disturbing.

How does one justify speaking ill of the dead?

Do we as a nation accept that one may mock a dead person who died tragically in an accident and splash morbid photographs of him on the Internet in the name of upholding race and religion?

Have we as a nation lost sight of simple human values that some of our politicians think that they can get away with by publicly mocking a dead man?

Why is the leadership of the party these politicians belong to not taking any action against them?

I was troubled by the sad, temerarious remarks of these politicians. I was troubled that extremism was getting a strong foothold in Malaysia and that these people were so brazen by their remarks due to a lack of reprisals.

I always believed that if extremism is allowed to flourish and prosper, that would spell the end of this country. For the first time, reading the offensive comments and the lack of reprisals and condemnation of the remarks, I felt as if extremism has not only got a foothold but is being allowed to flourish in Malaysia.

Some may say that I have been blind to the obvious and that the writing has been on the wall for some time now. Others may say that I am reading too much into this and am over-reacting.

Whichever way, this has led me to reassess what my answer ought to be if asked the question whether I would encourage my kids to stay overseas if they do go abroad to study.

Quite frankly, I am not so sure what my answer would be anymore.