Babi,kambing,lembu – What’s your favourite food?

I started off being furious at the food-based name-calling, but my friends’ attitude changed all that.

COMMENT

I must confess that when I first heard the Red Shirts participants chant “Cina babi” at the street rally on Wednesday, I was furious. But then most of my wonderful Chinese friends calmed me down – “you don’t bark when you are barked at” they said.

So very true indeed. We are what we eat.

Even in love, we are often advised that the way to win someone’s heart, is through his stomach. After all, how many of us women have not been told that we would not be able to find a husband if we could not cook.

Food plays a role in religion as well – in some religions we give food offerings to please God while in others, we refrain from food to please God.

I guess being a Malaysian, food is part and parcel of our lives. Why else would we greet people with “Sudah makan?” Why do we wait anxiously for the month of Ramadan every year drooling at the mere thought of local delicacies to be found at the street bazar; salivating at being invited to Hari Raya open houses where we can eat until we drop. It is why we often eagerly ask “Got food ah?” when invited to gatherings and events.

So wise are my Chinese friends who are not ticked off by Jamal Yunos’ name calling. When Jamal claimed the Chinese shouldn’t be offended by being addressed as pigs because the Chinese loved pork, my awesome friends agreed with him.

Like my friend, Carol Ng who said – “Pigs are cute. So why get offended? After all, by calling us Cina babi, Jamal is saying we Chinese are cute!”

And then another friend of mine, Kent Tan, updated his Facebook status – “I am not only a Cina babi, I am also a Cina udang, Cina KFC, Cina mee goreng mamak, Cina cendol.”

Soon this ‘Cina babi’ fever infected others and they too quickly came up with suitable names for themselves.

Then my Indian friends pulak got offended! Ayooo kadavule…

Clarence Kuna, a friend and a theatre enthusiast was among the first to update his Facebook status to point out how unfair things were. He said – “So they had a big gathering and shouted ‘Cina babi’. Now we Indians feel left out…”

Oh dear, Jamal Yunos! See what you did. You are clearly not treating the minorities fairly. Shame on you!

Alrighty, we can do this. Clarence, I bestow upon you the name India Kambing because I heard you love mutton curry. Okay vaa?

Now that we’ve got the two biggest minorities covered, what about the majority? Come on, we can’t practice double standards now, can we?

Looking at Jamal Yunos’s face, my intuition tells me that he must be a budu lover. So I say we shall call him Melayu bodo. Oopsss! Sorry, my mistake. I meant Melayu budu. Or is it Melayu belacan?

On second thought, like most of my Malay friends who go crazy for ikan bakar, perhaps Jamal enjoys ikan bakar extra crispy. Ok fine, we shall also call him Melayu ikan bakar terlebih hangus – suits him very well. What say you?

Aaah…how nice. Now everyone can live happily in Malaysia since we practise equality on all levels and fronts.

Opps, I almost forgot about myself. Being a foodie, it ain’t easy to pick one food to represent myself and not get all offended about it. But after a lot of thinking, I have made up my mind.

I bestow upon me the name ‘Mamak pasembor’. Nice eh?

So, how about you? What’s your favourite food?