Tears as mother’s illness gives 2 children an adult-size problem

 

V Thenmoli weeps as she talks about how her children help her at home.

PETALING JAYA: At the ages of seven and five, Pritib Narayanan and his sister Kavya Sree have had to take on an adult-size problem in helping to look after their ailing mother.

After they return from school and kindergarten, they make sure their mother, V Thenmoli, takes her cocktail of pills, and check to see that she has been bathed and changed and fed.

“My children, especially my eldest, are always helping me. My son (Pritib) would even skip school to accompany me to the hospital. He clothes me, holds my hands as we walk, and carries my legs out of the Grab car because I can’t lift them,” she said with tears streaming down her face.

Watch the video here.

“He looks after me… although I’m supposed to be the one looking after him.”

For the past two years, Thenmoli, 40, has suffered breathing problems, as well as diabetes and obesity, and has difficulty in moving about.

She is in constant need of oxygen from a tank to help her to breathe.

It is believed that she has suffered a pulmonary embolism, a blood clot disorder which affects the flow of blood to the lungs, but doctors treating her at Hospital Putrajaya cannot reveal details of her condition.

Thenmoli has breathing problems and constantly needs oxygen from a tank.

She has been unable to care for her children, who depend on the generosity of their neighbours to cook their meals, wash their clothes, and take them to school.

Thenmoli and her children live in a sparsely furnished house in a palm oil estate in Dengkil, with just a couple of mattresses in the living area, an armchair and an altar. She keeps only essential items with her, such as the oxygen tank, medicines and a table fan.

She usually sits on the coarse and cracked cement floor of her bedroom looking out of her paneless window, longing to move beyond the four walls.

“I feel trapped in my room … I can move around, but it is difficult. If I fall, I won’t be able to get up,” she said, adding that she only moves when she must.

A former janitor, Thenmoli was married for 13 years to a foreign worker. She said he abandoned her after she fell ill, and provided no support or financial assistance.

Thenmoli with daughter Kavya Sree, 5, and son Pritib Narayanan, 7.

“He gave me an ultimatum, saying he will care for the children only if he gets full custody. I can’t do that, they are all I have left,” she said.

Thenmoli is swamped with debts and many outstanding bills that she cannot pay off, being unable to work for a living.

The electricity in her home might soon be cut off, and if she does not pay RM 1,000 soon, she will not be able to use her oxygen tank.

Fortunately, a cousin, Maneesha Purushothaman, 26, has been a reliable presence in Thenmoli’s life, often providing financial assistance with the money she gets from her part-time job.

“She doesn’t have anyone to support her, so I have been sending food and buying groceries since the MCO (movement control order) started. Until now I am supporting her, but I can only do so much to help,” she told FMT.

“She contacted me recently and told me that she and the children had hardly eaten for two weeks. So, I bought some groceries for one month which cost about RM300 to RM400 because she has special dietary needs.”

Maneesha also said Thenmoli had been forced to reduce her use of oxygen – each tank costs RM100 – as she could not afford it. This has worsened her condition. Her visits to the hospital have also been reduced by her immobility and the lack of money to pay for transport.

Thenmoli receives RM350 in financial aid from the Welfare Department, but it is a meagre amount. “She needs financial help to pay off her bills, to buy groceries, to pay her daughter’s kindergarten fees and for her treatment,” Maneesha said.

Thenmoli would welcome donations, as well as clothes for her children.

For those who wish to help V Thenmoli, do drop us a WhatsApp message on FMT’s Helpline at 0193899839.

-FMT