Last week, a friend of mine, Bob, attended the Christmas party in his office. Having missed the celebration throughout the two years of the Covid-19 pandemic, Bob was looking forward to having a good time at the party.
Two weeks prior to the party, those who wanted to join the celebration had to register their names with the HR Department. Some colleagues of Bob decided not to attend. Those who did were assigned to be Secret Santas and needed to buy a gift costing under RM20.
Secret Santa is a gift exchange arrangement where a person randomly picks the name of another and is responsible to get them a Christmas gift within an agreed budget. Names of the giver stay anonymous.
Bob ended up being the Secret Santa of a new office mate, Cherry. Carrying on the spirit of Christmas, Bob wanted to get her something she’d like. So, Bob began observing Cherry to gather some details about her.
Bob soon learned that Cherry is a coffee lover. She walks into the office every morning with a Starbucks cup and makes several trips to the pantry throughout the day to get her coffee fixed.
That gave Bob an idea for the perfect gift for Cherry – two pairs of colourful socks, one with cute coffee beans and another with coffee cups.
At the Christmas party, Cherry was delighted with the coffee-themed socks she received from her Secret Santa. The gift was personal and thoughtful.
Unfortunately, most of the other gifts were not.
Bob’s Secret Santa gave him a tacky cushion with pictures of cats - he doesn’t even like cats. Another colleague of his, who seldom walks around the office wearing his premium Sony wireless headphone, received an RM10 earphone - he might probably never use them.
Many of Bob's colleagues received various generic gifts, like candles, picture frames, potpourri and a mug - most probably bought from the RM5 Japanese store next to their office building.
Bob forced a smile as he held his Christmas gift. He was disappointed with the lazy Secret Santas in his office who did not show any effort in spreading the Christmas cheer. He did not understand why they even took part in the celebration if they were not willing to put in the effort.
A worst Christmas gift…
Like Bob, I too received a disappointing gift from my Secret Santa - I received cash in an envelope. Most probably my Secret Santa forgot all about the gift exchange and thought it was easier to give cash. After all, everyone loves cash, right? Wrong.
If there was 'the worst Christmas gift received from a Secret Santa' award, the winner would definitely be another friend of mine who received a pack of face masks. In second place would be his colleague who received two boxes of Covid test kits. Yup, these are true stories and you better believe it!
I understand these horrible gifts might have come from people who procrastinated Christmas shopping and ended up getting some last-minute gifts. Or perhaps they are just those people who don't bother to make a big deal out of Christmas and end up digging around the house to find something to stuff into a sad, wrinkled paper bag and call it a gift.
These gifts are not thoughtful. They are upsetting and they go against the very spirit of Christmas.
Christmas during the pandemic
During the last two Christmases, we had so much time in our hands. We were cooped up in our homes and most of our social activities took place in the virtual world, including work. We couldn’t shop for gifts for friends and colleagues, or even attend Christmas parties as we had done in previous years.
In 2020, the Christmas celebration was permitted only for private family gatherings and limited to one day only. In 2021, the celebration was allowed for two days but only for family members who were fully vaccinated.
Those attending the gatherings were required to adhere to a set of SOPs including getting themselves tested for Covid-19, observing physical distancing and wearing a face mask at all times except when eating.
Many of us complained during those two difficult years that we missed the good old days when we could put our hearts and souls into spreading Christmas cheer and spirit. We missed Christmas shopping. We missed party invitations. We missed our friends and colleagues. And we missed spending good times together.
Yet here we are.
Hasn’t the pandemic taught us anything?
We have all experienced a different sense of deep loss during the pandemic. We know someone who was claimed way too early. We know someone who is still grieving the death of a loved one.
And many of us are still battling post-pandemic stress, anxiety, depression and mental health. I know I am.
Why, then, are we not taking the opportunity during this Christmas to spread some love and kindness?
We don’t have to believe in Santa Claus or the Christmas miracle, but we can believe in kindness, right?
I, for one, believe in the spirit of Christmas. I believe Christmas is not about struggling with shopping lists, attending party invitations or opening presents. It is about opening our hearts and doing a little something extra for someone else. It is all about forgetting ourselves and finding time for others. It is about finding happiness when we see joy in others.
It is about healing others while trying to heal ourselves.
My perfect Christmas gift
I received a perfect Christmas gift from a friend a few days ago. It was a handmade voucher book. Each page was printed with different activities which we both could do together in the future – trying out a new coffee place, catching a movie, cooking my favourite dinner and going for a short weekend getaway, were among them.
My friend might have spent only a few ringgit to print the vouchers, but the fact that she wants to spend her precious time with me is what makes it a perfect gift.
The key word here is ‘time’. The best gift we can give our family and friends this Christmas is our time. Investing our time to give them an experience and a good memory is what makes it the greatest gift.
If only Bob’s Secret Santa spent some time getting to know him; if only his Secret Santa spent enough time to find him a thoughtful gift, I am certain Bob would have been happy.
As I said, it’s not about the gift, it’s about the effort and the time we put aside for someone else that shows we care.
Our time is priceless and precious. This Christmas let’s share it like the fleeting treasure it is.
Merry Christmas! - Mkini
FA ABDUL is a multi-award-winning playwright and director in the local performing arts scene, a published author, television scriptwriter, media trainer, and mother. Her ultimate mission in life is to live out of a small suitcase.
The views expressed here are those of the author/contributor and do not necessarily represent the views of MMKtT.
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