Stupider Malayans

By DUMNO

Tuan-tuan dan puan-puan. Puan-puan dan tuan-tuan. Datuk-datuk, nenek-nenek, batuk-batuk, hingus-hingus dan lain-lain seklian. I will now change my mode again for the sake of the stupit non's. * ahem * Ya mah, you are non-Malay, non-Muslim, non-Bumiputra werd. You are nothing but a NON ! And we DUMNO, are non-NON's. Unnersten? Goblok !!

Yesterday I was tolding you oredi how come dumno will winning the cuming eRection. Now you know how lor. So easy only mah. PKR bring up Altantuya, people vote for PKR. BN bring up Hudud, people vote for BN, PKR bring up Teoh Beng Hock, people vote for PKR, and I can go on and on and on and on. Even worster, some gong-gong called Merdeka-rating always seems to justify it with real-looking statistik. And then some dungoo political expert big name will come up and make statements that even the Prophet will be surprised. Aiyahhhhhhhhhh wasting time leh. It is so easy. Kangkung oso cannot get easier.

Malayans are simply stupit lor. So stupit until you have no tulang-belakang. No tulang-depan, and no tulang-tepi. Tulang atas dan bawah pun dun have !! Lalang oso stronger than you ah !! It is because you all as stupit as you are that you have today mah. I tell you one secret-lah. Politik is dirty. Dirty Dancing oso not so dirty. We ahli politik are like David Copperfield. We can make things appear and disappear whenever we want. Not because we pray to Syaitan. No, we oredi kowtim Syaitan. He now works for us. We the ahli Politik give you all wayang everyday. Udderwise you will say dat we never do our job. So, how to look like we do our job? Appear everyday in Ugutan Malaysia lor. You all never read dat paper wan meh? No ah? New Snake Times? The Star, Sun and Moon are all Cult newspapers oredi mah, so no need to mention them. Oso, their talking so funny. Who unnersten what they say? We Malayans speak dis way mah, and even our England skool teachers speak dis way, so if Star Sun and Moon dun write this way, we wont give them any more lesen. Really wan. Ibrahim Ali said so. He told me tree times. Really !! Wan... Too... Tree ... heh heh.

Now back to the Hootoot Law. We, the DUMNO actually dowan it wan. How can?!?! We bluff you all only. If DUMNO allow it ah, then we got no more hands and legs leh, coz all kena chop off. How to hamsup young underaged girls anymore laidet? DUMNO people all very hamsup, and extremely Kudikaran oso mah. Hahaha surprise you dat I can oso speaking Yindan leh. I oso got much-much Yindian spy. You think we have MIC for fun ah? You think MCA for fun izzit? They are actually all our spy mah !! James Bond oso cannot lawan ah. But ours is called James Gong, and James Kongket.

I tell you anudder secret. NEP is actually a komunis konsep. Take from rich, give to poor. You all so stupit until so simple thing oso you dunno. Hahahahahahaha Some more call it Robing Hoot. We rob you ah... you Ah Hoot, the Toot !! See?? I prove to you dat you are all so Toot oredi. Some more say you wan to be First World wor. How to be First World if you all so stupit? I say oredi, the only tulang you have is the one in your trousers! Dat oso must use "Ali's walking-stick" or the Cheena call "Wai Kor", to tolong. No wonder people say dat Malayans are Truly "lemah-lembut" Kakakakakakaka

We not scared of Anwar. We scared Malayans want female PM. Oredi the Fei-fei Lady of Putrajaya kontrol dis country. Like Sri Lanka, India, Israel, Central African Republic, Great Britain, Portugal, Bolivia, Dominica, Iceland, Norway, Yugoslavia, Malta, Netherlands, Philippines, Pakistan, Lithuania, Nicaragua, Ireland, Haiti, Germany, Bangladesh, Poland, Canada, Burundi, Rwanda, Turkey, Bulgaria, Guyana, New Zealand, Mongolia, Panama, Latvia, Finland and the latest one Thailand. But the Sawadikha one is actually a Barbie Doll, because of her DuckSin brudder, so dat wan dun count. Anyway, Malayan men's cuckoo-bird have "Roaming Problem". They think they is a Romeo, and so, must sewa some Chooliet to hamsup. Dat's why DUMNO will RULE FOREVER AND EVER lor.

So easy ! I hope the Malayan Crime Minister wont come and C4 me for telling you all dis cigarettes. She very garang wan. Her husband is ok. He just wanna hamsup Mongolian girls. Better run fast-fast and go call uncle C4. He told me oredi boom-boom Tugu Keganasan today. See, he even send me dis gambar as proof. He tooken it with his henfone.

OK I quickly change my mode again, before the fatty bom-bom in PuraJaya scold me.

Seklian dan Terima Kasih.