Bersih 3.0. Marches Had Spearmints. Now We Are Killers Pulak!

The Bersih 3.0 marchers and supporters are certainly a colourful lot, i.e. given the multitude of colours in a sea of yellow on April 28, 2012.

Though 99.9% of those who came out willingly saw themselves as peaceful fellows, albeit many who opposed it being hijacked by politicians, nevertheless they went with their caps, cameras, balloons, flowers, angry birds, towels, salt, water bottles and other paraphernalia associated with a festive celebration.

And the violence, riot, fights, scuffles, plus the many more thesaurus term being used by the anti Bersih, government, their supporters and even the law enforcement agencies, are all meant to demonise the thousands peaceful citizens who had no idea what happened would happen.

Of course, we now know the reason to paint the dark side of the supporters so that the government can wield the strong arm of the law to prosecute all those 'troublemakers'.

As if branding them, the marchers that is, as lawbreakers, misfits, misled, bias, shioksendiri,  rioters, troublemakers, agent provocateurs, commies even, they are now labelled as killers or potential killers. The last chop mark was revealed by none other than the Home Minister. For a Home Minister to use such strong labelling, his intelligence, no not the grey matter that seems missing above the neck, but the intelligence gathering machinery must really have sniffed out the 'killers' among the thousands for him to accuse the Bersih event as one where murder must be on its agenda besides being willingly hijacked by politicians, sit down protest and what have you!

To reinforce this cousin's believe and conviction, the other cousin even revealed after about two weeks post event to a huge audience of party fans in a keynote address mind you saying with conviction '“Police were beaten up with baseball bats until they vomited blood. Are these civilised people?."

Gosh really, how uncivilised the Bersih fellow must be. And those there including yours truly saw flowers, flagpoles with Jalur gemilang, angry bird balloons and yellow balloon sticks, camera and video tripods being carried by the 'yellow side' group. While the 'blue side' we saw revolvers, batons, teargas guns, trucks, water cannons, razor wires, barricades, helicopters.

Remember how Uncle Sam's citizens were Bush-whacked into believing Saddam had WMDs? Well in BolehLand, the Bersih fellows are being 'baseball' walloped by some  jib-berish accusation of 'baseball' WMD used during the event! Well as they say if you want to believe what you believe, you'd believe it in anything you see or imagined right>?

One isn't sure where the baseball bats came from. And don't even ask for the baseball bat to be shown as evidence because the authorities will surely be able to produce a whole bunch of baseball bats if need be right?And don't be surprised if other sports equipment will later be discovered being carried by Bersih supporters and used as WMD. Let's see hockey sticks, cricket bats (hope not from the Selangor Club that sits smack in Dataran Merdeka), badminton rackets. ping pong bats (after all many Chinese among the marchers right?) even marbles.

<----- Spotted 'baseball bat' to wallop till vomit?
So now the yellow crowd is said to have baseball bats which surely if you tell it to kampung folks and ole men and women that they are killer weapons, they'd surely believe that we intend to use them to whack anyone till they vomit right? And you add 1cousin's 1 plus another 1cousin's 1, you get two fantastic immutable fact that there are killers in Bersih 3.0 marchers intent on whacking the law enforcers till they vomit and to kill!

Gosh that makes the thousands potential killers! 

Wonder if the young impressionable students believe 1coursin's tale of 'killers' lurking among the Bersih 3.0 crowd or the thousands of party fan club believe the other 1cousin's tale of 'baseball' bats used to wallop till vomitting, eh? 

The benefit of doubt goes to the students who would most likely disbelieve 1cousin, while the other thousands will by blind obedience will believe the tale of the other 1cousin huh? 

If you want to make your story 'credible' you need to scratch each other's back right? Whether it's the truth or lie doesn't matter. Once you both are in sync 'scratching each other's back, what you say will be reinforced as either a fact, truth or an outright lie.

Whether it's the truth or lie what both these cousins uttered is a matter of perception really. As the saying goes, you can tell the truth or lie to some people all the time, but you can't do that all the time to all right?

So what's next after this 'killer' label and new found evidence of 'baseball bat' used to wallop till vomit? on Bersih 3.0 marchers?

Hmm, let's see, they haven't used the laser weapons yet, neither aliens (extra terrestrial and those associated with migrants, though one suspect the latter is not being mentioned possible because the ruling side wants their vote come GE13 huh?) , catapult, stones, alcoholic bottles, even yeo hup sing packet drinks, what about straws that can poke the eye of the law officers, hey even those wearing stilettos are deadly weapons, wigs as impersonation, even dressed up like some Arabs as potential suicide bombers?

Hmm, even those with sharp finger nails can also be considered carrying lethal weapons, so are keys, even teeth can be used to bite so deadly weapons again, and don't forget belts, you can use it as a whip or strangle your opponent, those carrying mamak teh tarik in plastic bag and rafiah string also deadly weapons as string can use to strangle, mydin plastic bags or those use to ta pau mamak roti canai can be used to choke too, banners can use to strange too, so too flagpoles can be used as kung fu weapons. And don't forget we were told even cameras are deadly weapons so too your mobile phone and SD card! 

And many, including yours truly had Spearmints in their pocket and using them. Surely these are considered deadly WMDs after all the name has 'spear' in it, right? 

Gosh seems everything is deadly on the Bersih 3.0 marchers. On hindsight in the next Bersih 4.0 why not have minimalist attire or do a full monty. Will that be permissible after of course passing the halal fatwa certification that you can gather at all eh? 

What more inventive theories will these two cousins and those who opposed Bersih will come up with next? Let's not strain our brains silly to vomit out more conspiracy theories and discover weapons of mass destruction shall we as we have ready supply from the cousins and our leaders anyway.

 Dress code for next Bersih march?

- YAHMEH!!!