Each of us has a brain that is designed to be malleable and open to our influence. It is constantly shaping itself to be the best one it can be for us. Our experiences are the fuel for this shaping and everything we see, feel, experience, sense and do is slowly but surely changing the architecture of our brains, sending gentle instruction on how they can build to best support us.
Between the walls of our skulls, billions of neurons (brain cells) work together to shape us into the humans we are. Different neurons are responsible for different parts of our experience, whether it is eating, feeling, sleeping, sensing threat, firing up, falling in love, spelling, laughing, remembering, learning, nurturing, etc. Being human is complicated and our brain drives all of it - it is no wonder we are still discovering its secrets.
Every time you have an experience, the relevant neurons switch on and start firing. As this happens, neural connections get stronger and new synapses start growing.
Even as you read this, sparks are flying in your head. About 100 billion neurons are waiting and ready to act, but not all of them will be recruited. The ones that are will depend on the experience you are having. The neurons that are connected to your immediate experience - what you are feeling, thinking, seeing, sensing, doing, experiencing - will fire and new connections will start to form within minutes. The more connected the neurons, the stronger that area of the brain, the more responsive and effective it will be.
The neurons that are not as needed will eventually wither away. This withering away is normal and healthy and is one way the brain grows into its most efficient self. You cannot grow the edges of your head so your brain occupies some precious real estate. The space is reserved for the neurons that you need the most - the ones that will best support you given the life you are living.
Every time we have an experience, the corresponding neurons are activated. Every time they are activated, they are elevated a little in the order of importance. Repeating or prolonging an experience will keep the connections between neurons strong and ensure that they stay. This is why, for example, we can recite the alphabet without thinking. It is not because we were born baby geniuses with a cute alphabet jingle imprinted into our brains. It is because throughout our childhood, we sing the alphabet song and have it sung to us so many times, that the relevant neurons are repeatedly activated enough to eventually form rock solid connections.
Experience does not just effect change by creating new connections and strengthening existing ones. It also seems to reach into our genes and change the way they function. A regular practice of mindfulness, for example, will increase the activity of genes that have the capacity to soothe a stress reaction in the heat of a moment, ultimately making you more able to deal with stress.
Everything you experience will alter the physical structure of your brain in some way. The things you do, the people you spend time with, every feeling, thought, and automatic experience will influence the wiring of your brain to make you who you are and to influence who you can become.
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