Sweat, scandal spas and saunas

 

Sometimes, I think Malaysia’s national sport isn’t badminton or arguing about where chicken rice originated from (Malaysia or Singapore!). It’s spicy, unnecessary drama, and the recent raid at a men-only spa in Kuala Lumpur proves it.

Try not to get too excited, but I’m a regular at saunas and steam rooms. Three times a week, after my morning run, I head to the club near my house where I’m a member for some sweat recovery and maybe quiet me time.

Want to know the wildest thing I’ve ever seen in a Malaysian sauna? An elderly uncle stepping out, a towel slipping in slow motion off his waist and onto the ground. It was definitely shocking, but definitely not criminal. Totally harmless, in fact.

So when the spa raid hit the news, I wasn’t exactly shocked but actually a little irritated. Raids like this do happen in Malaysia. To be honest, these raids rarely have anything to do with licences or safety rules.

It doesn’t happen every day, but enough that we know moral policing is lurking somewhere. It happens because someone somewhere thinks morality needs enforcement. Usually, it happens in places with dim lights, soft music, or, heaven forbid, men-only spaces.

Imagine being at a spa, stepping into the steam room, closing your eyes, and just as you feel the heat, the door bursts open and officers burst in. Before you can even adjust your towel, you’re lined up, questioned, and photographed.

Instead of relaxing, you end up as a forwarded WhatsApp video message. And of course, Malaysians are masters of assumption. They hear it’s a men-only spa, and all kinds of perverted ideas and scandalous thoughts come into their heads.

No charges, but…

But after all the news and hoo-haa, most of the men were released because there was nothing to charge them with. No victims. No evidence. No crime. A massive raid that ended up with nothing but a group of innocent people now with their reputations ruined.

The effects, however, are severe. Dragging half-dressed men out of a sauna and turning it into a public spectacle just shows how much privacy is basically being trampled on and not respected. Shaming is already wrong, but when there isn’t any basis, it is just a step too far.

There’s also the fact that enforcement agencies actually have real work to do. They should be out there stopping real crime, such as scams, theft, corruption and violent offences, like when journalists are publicly assaulted.

These are things that actually hurt people, and there’s no shortage of actual problems that involve lawbreaking. Policing morality just isn’t the priority. So let’s not waste our valuable resources investigating these kinds of so-called incidents.

Real people

In the middle of all this are real people. Teachers, office workers, retirees, and civil servants, who probably just wanted some quiet, relaxing time. They had to explain themselves to family and employers who read headlines too literally.

Which is why employers should absolutely not punish staff caught in this. If someone wasn’t charged, wasn’t implicated, wasn’t found guilty, punishing them is unfair, unnecessary, and ridiculous. Innocent should mean innocent. Full stop.

We’re a multicultural and multifaith country where morality isn’t one-size-fits-all, and personal choices shouldn’t be policed by assumption. Most Malaysians just want to live quietly, enjoy privacy, and maybe have a sauna without worrying about surprise visitors in uniform.

As usual, I believe that we can cope with absurdity with humour. We joke about it because it’s our way of surviving and making sense of things. But beneath the laughter is a simple truth that everyone deserves dignity.

So maybe next time, our authorities should take a pause before taking on the mantle of moral police. Check the facts. Respect privacy. Don’t punish people baselessly. Just let Malaysians sweat in peace, towel-slip mishaps included.

The police should focus on crime, not religious morality. Saunas are meant to unclog pores, not complicate lives. And if uncle’s towel slips? Let it slip, and it’s okay to ignore it and pretend like it didn’t happen.- Mkini

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ZAN AZLEE is a writer, documentary filmmaker, journalist and academic. Visit fatbidin.com to view his work.

The views expressed here are those of the author/contributor and do not necessarily represent the views of MMKtT.