Patience is a virtue and there is a reason - it is a tough skill to master.
Imagine, for instance, that you are waiting
for someone to finish compiling a report that you need for a meeting. You are
already late, you can feel your body getting tense and you are starting to get
angry. Suddenly, you lose your temper and yell at the person for putting you
behind schedule. You can tell that they are shocked and upset by your outburst
but you cannot help it.
What Is Patience?
Patience
is the ability to stay calm while you are waiting for an outcome that you need
or want. It comes in three main varieties: interpersonal patience, life
hardship patience and daily hassles patience.
Let us look at these in more detail:
1. Interpersonal Patience
Interpersonal patience is patience with other people, their demands and
their failings. You may consider some people to be slow learners,
hard to understand, or even downright unreasonable. Or, they may have bad
habits that drive you crazy. But losing your patience with them will be of no
benefit and it may make matters worse. Patience and understanding toward
others are essential when you are onboarding new staff or when you are
delegating tasks. It is also a huge help in dealing with difficult co-workers
or managers and it is central to high-quality customer service. This type
of patience is active. Listening skills and empathy are vital and, when
you are dealing with difficult people, you need the
self-awareness and emotional intelligence to understand how your
words and actions affect the situation. You cannot just wait it out and hope
for the best.
2. Life Hardship Patience
We could use the term perseverance to sum up life hardship patience. It
can mean having the patience to overcome a serious setback in life, like
waiting long term for the outcome of a lawsuit or for medical treatment. But it
can also include your ability to work toward a long-term goal - whether it is
professional, such as a promotion, or personal, like getting fit or saving for
a vacation. Whatever the obstacle you have to overcome, it will likely
require determination and focus to achieve. And you will need to keep your
emotions under control throughout the journey. These emotions can range from
eagerness to get it done, to anger at the frustrations you encounter along the
way - which can cause you to become demotivated.
3. Daily Hassles Patience
Sometimes you need patience to deal with circumstances that are beyond
your control. These are your "life hassles." Something as trivial as
getting stuck in a traffic line, for instance or waiting for a computer program
to load. You also need patience to get through those dull but unavoidable
day-to-day tasks that do not necessarily contribute to your personal goals. The
ability to maintain self-discipline and during the course of your work -
no matter how mundane - the attention to detail it needs, is a hallmark of
patience.
The Benefits and Risks of Patience
In general, being patient means that you are more likely viewed
positively by your co-workers and managers (and your family and friends). You
will likely be a better team worker and be more focused and productive.
If you are often impatient, people may see you as arrogant, insensitive
and impulsive. Co-workers may think that you are a poor decision maker because
you make snap judgments or interrupt people. If you get a reputation for having
poor people skills and a bad temper, others may even deliberately avoid working
with you. As a result, not surprisingly, impatient people will unlikely be top
of the list for promotion.
Of course, being patient does not mean you should be a "pushover." Far from it. Sometimes it is fine to show your displeasure when people keep you waiting unnecessarily. So, ensure that you establish strong boundaries. But be sure that you are polite and assertive, never angry and aggressive.
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