Nose Not Sharp Cheek Push-Push

Instead of quarrelling about whether they agree or disagree to remarry PAS, they should first check wether PAS has any desire to remarry them. If not then the Malays would call this hidung tak mancung pipi tersorong-sorongor nose not sharp cheek push-push.

NO HOLDS BARRED

Raja Petra Kamarudin

These Pakatan Harapan people are suffering from PDS or Post Divorce Syndrome. The Malay term for this is Gila Talak or Divorce Madness. This situation comes about when you divorce your partner (normally it is the man who divorces the woman and this can be done with a simple ‘I hereby divorce you’ declaration although some say an email, SMS or WhatsApp message can also be valid) and then later you regret doing so.

In Islam you are allowed to divorce your wife twice (of course, the second divorce can only happen when you remarry after the first divorce). Once you divorce a third time it is final and you divorce for good.

That means you marry once, get divorced, then marry a second time, and then divorce again, and then marry a third time, and then divorce again (three times married and three times divorced). However, once you divorce your wife a third time you cannot remarry. Malays calls this Talak Tiga. Americans call it three strikes and you are out.

If you still want to remarry after the third divorce, your wife first needs to marry someone else. After your wife marries someone else they must then divorce and then you can marry her again, for the fourth time. This other person your wife marries after your third divorce is called Cina Buta or Blind Chinaman. Why this person is called a Blind Chinaman is not known but there must be a reason for that and a story behind it.

So, after you divorce your wife again, after the third marriage, you cannot marry her again for the fourth time. You must first arrange a Blind Chinaman to marry her and then this Blind Chinaman has to divorce her. If the Blind Chinaman does not divorce your ex-wife and decides to stay married to her then you are in deep shit.

This has happened a number of times, once even to a friend of mine. And he got quite sore when we joked about it and told him, “Lain kali carilah Cina Buta. Ini cari Cina Celek buat apa?” Somehow my friend did not see the whole situation as humorous as we did since the Cina Buta who was actually a Cina Celek was a young, handsome man who my friend’s ex-wife probably thought was a better deal than my friend who was more than twice his ex-wife’s new Cina Buta husband’s age.

Invariably, my friend suffered from Gila Talak but, as the Malays would say, nasi sudah jadi bubur or the rice has already become porridge. So the best my friend could do was just slurp the bubur in fuming silence.

But what is more amusing is the Gila Talak that Pakatan Harapan is suffering from. DAP divorced PAS in 1995 after the APU-Gagasan marriage in 1990. Then DAP divorced PAS in 2001 after the Barisan Alternatif marriage in 1999. Then, for the third time, DAP divorced PAS in 2015 after the Pakatan Rakyat marriage in 2008. That comes to Talak Tiga and they can no longer marry PAS for the fourth time until PAS first of all enters into a Cina Buta marriage with someone else.

But then PAS has no desire to enter into any Cina Buta marriage with anyone or marry DAP for the fourth time. However, Lim Kit Siang, Lim Guan Eng, Anwar Ibrahim, Azmin Ali, Rafizi Ramli, Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad, Saifuddin Nasution, Latheefa Koya, and so many other DAP, PKR, PAN and PPBM leaders, are quarrelling about whether they should or should not remarry PAS for the fourth time.

The issue here is not whether they do or do not want to remarry PAS and if so who should be the Cina Buta so that they can remarry PAS for the fourth time. The issue is does PAS want to remarry DAP and parti-parti yang sewaktu dengannya?

Instead of quarrelling about whether they agree or disagree to remarry PAS, they should first check wether PAS has any desire to remarry them. If not then the Malays would call this hidung tak mancung pipi tersorong-sorong or nose not sharp cheek push-push.