The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog

When we were kids and first learnt to type on the old typewriter, we had to practice endlessly using this sentence: The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog. It is an English-language pangram - a sentence that contains all of the letters of the alphabet. Doesn’t this Yusop fable capture Malaysia’s game of thrones?

“Once upon a time, there was a cunning brown fox who ruled Bolehland with an iron fist for many years. The rebel dogs in his kingdom howled for reforms but the brown fox responded by locking up their leader for many years.

As the fox got older, he passed the crown to his successor Mumraz, who learned all the fox’s tricks and soon began to amass even greater wealth and power than the fox ever had. This threatened the fox’s interests and especially the prospects for his cub as the leader-in-waiting of Bolehland.

So, the brown fox thought of a plan – he got together a small pack of foxes and made an alliance with the bigger numbers of rebel dogs who had been his enemies before. These rebels thought that the brown fox was the lesser of the two evils compared to Mumraz the kleptocrat and duly anointed him “Saviour of the Realm”. They convinced the rest of the kingdom that the fox had turned vegetarian and promised longevity to all who believed him.

The alliance was a success. At the Battle of Maytheninth, the brown fox and his rebel army succeeded in overthrowing Mumraz the Kleptocrat. Although the fox had the smallest pack compared to the rebel dogs, he managed to convince the rebels that he deserved the crown.

He wasted no time in dividing the rebel dogs who were too concerned with dividing the spoils of the kingdom. He not only seduced some of the rebel dogs to join his pack but has also succeeded in cultivating allies from the vanquished Mumraz’ hordes. Before long, these rebel dogs were divided and those aligned with the cunning fox turned into cats. Soon they began to fight like cats and dogs.

The problem was, the leader of the rebel dogs, in his obsession to wear the crown, had become lazy and had lost his reformist zeal.

The quick brown fox laughed triumphantly. He had not only jumped over the lazy dog but he had positioned his son, who was some way down the succession ladder, to inherit the crown much sooner than anyone thought … that’s twice upon a time!”

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The writer, Kua Kia Soong is Suaram advisor. - Mkini