Malaysia Day 2063

SATIRE | On the day celebrating the 100th anniversary of Malaysia Day 2063, the Supreme Minister of the Supreme Pakatan, the nation’s newest governing coalition of parties, surprised the nation by declaring an extra week of public holidays to celebrate the success of two sacred national missions.

The first completed mission was related to the recent survey finding of the Kementerian Tatanegara (until 2020 known as Biro Tatanegara) that over 90 percent of the nation's citizens agree with the declaration: “I am bumiputra first and Malaysian second”.

Covering a sample of citizens over the age of 16, the survey's finding was announced over the government media stations, Berita and TV Mal-gibberish. According to the Supreme Minister, this sentiment - putting ethnicity above all other considerations in the national identity - had been advocated by the political giants of the country's history since independence.

But in the first 60 years after Merdeka, advocates of the “bumiputra first” movement had to go on the defensive by the fake news liberal lobby that dominated social media. Many of the early nationalist supporters of the movement could not openly propagate their views for fear of being labelled as “ultras”.

Whilst being labelled as an “ultra” is now construed as a badge of honour, few at that time could emerge from the shadow of concealment when the “pendatang” capitalists, who dominated the economy at that time, withdrew their financial support in retaliation.

Thanks to the efforts of the early leaders of the pre-Supreme Pakatan parties in nurturing the ultra faction, the Jewish-inspired anti-national liberal groups were finally crushed by the “Sons of the Soil” Revolutionary Movement in the great purge of 2025, following the stunning electoral success of the combined racial and religious right-wing forces. The purge enabled the ultra movement to become the dominant force in changing national consciousness.

The survey finding vindicates the correctness of the pioneers of the “bumiputra first” movement to instil pride in the bumiputra race among all Malaysians without exception. It is also clear evidence that the ideology of bumiputra dominance is now deeply entrenched in all corners of the country and the young generation.

Alarming original bumiputra out-migration

At the same time, the Supreme Minister expressed concern that 10 percent of the citizenry was still resisting alignment to this pivotal inclusive categorisation. Of greater worry was the finding that while Malaysians from all ethnic groups were identifying themselves as bumiputra first, the exodus of original bumiputra from the country was continuing.

The Department of Statistics latest data on population movement showed that several million original bumiputra – mainly upper and middle class - had departed the country during the past five years.

In his speech, the Supreme Minister emphasised that the country could not afford the haemorrhage of talented and highly qualified original bumiputra and announced that a generous package of material and financial incentives, including the latest model of Malaysia’s own flying car, was being provided to attract them to return and remain in Malaysia.

Further, to ensure the stability of the original bumiputra population, the Deputy Supreme Minister in charge of Kementerian Tatanegara pledged to hunt down the recalcitrants among the original and new bumiputra. Reorientation camps were being planned to re-educate the separatist groups among bumiputra and those still identifying themselves as non-bumiputra to bring them into the mainstream of ethnic identification and ensure their loyalty to the country.

In response to the Supreme Minister' s speech, the country's highest scholarly body, the National Emeritus Professors Council (NEPC), noted that the finding showed that the much-maligned NEP (which the Council had proposed to be extended to the year 2069) had been responsible for providing the critical breakthrough in ethnic identity and national consciousness.

With all the different races identifying themselves as bumiputra, the much sought for elusive – and previously regarded as mythical - “national unity” was finally within reach. A non-bumiputra - but now classified as bumiputra - member of the NEPC concurred and enthused that it was now possible - in theory as well as in practice - to treat the different races in exactly the same way.

Down with ultra-kiasus, atheists and other deviants

Followers of the small group of “bumiputra first” Chinese professors, who gained prominence in the early years of the century for their criticism of the “ultra-kiasu” character of their own community members, expressed their thankfulness that the judgment of their mentors had been vindicated.

In their view shared over the bumiputra Chinese tabloid, Bumi Hua, recently launched following Operasi Lallang 2, the nons have finally woken to the realisation that professing bumiputra ethnicity is really no big deal.

In fact, it is a small price for ensuring that the true spirit of the sacred social contract that created an independent Malaya and Malaysia is observed. They are of the opinion that it is high time for the nation to return to its original historical roots. Hence the slogan - a bumiputra polity in the past, the present and forever – was appropriate.

Finally, they noted the many advantages that would accrue to those supporting and belonging to this designation of national identity. Countering the critics, they reassured that it was not material or financial benefits that were driving such a transformation in identity - just pure unadulterated patriotism and love for Malaysia.

As for the second sacred mission, the Supreme Minister disclosed that the nation could now be officially declared “atheist-free”. The battle against the godless and apostate groups had been long and difficult. This was due to the resistance of internal and external forces determined to spread their scientifically incorrect, godless and morally bankrupt ideology and philosophy.

These groups (which included religious deviants, perverts, members of the LGBT and communists) had taken advantage of a loophole in the Federal Constitution relating to basic rights and freedoms to spread their message, which included questioning the existence of God, especially to the young and gullible.

In doing so, they had disturbed the established order and hurt the feelings of the majority of the citizens. Worse, they were working in tandem with opposition elements to establish a secular nation.

This unholy coalition was finally defeated by two factors. The first was the key role of preachers in emphasising the importance of religious supremacy and the need to counter godless and apostate individuals and groups.

On this subject, the Supreme Minister paid special tribute to the legendary foreign preacher who sacrificed his comfortable position in his home country to help lead the battle against liberalism and moderation. Had this campaign not been launched several decades earlier, the country would have lost its war against the secular, liberal and moderate forces that were consolidating then.

The second was the passing of the constitutional provision after the decisive 16th general election, which removed the separation of state and religion in the Federal Constitution, as well as enshrined the concept of bumiputra nationalism definitively and beyond doubt.

The Supreme Minister concluded that it was due to God's grace that the dreams of earlier leaders, as reflected in the Rukunegara, Vision 2020 and 1Malaysia Negaraku, were finally being realised.

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LIM TECK GHEE is a public policy analyst and author of the book ‘Challenging Malaysia's Status Quo’. - Mkini