A letter to the PM on child marriage

Dear prime minister,

My name is Tasha and I am 10 years old. I live in Kampung Pandan Dalam Kiri, Selangor with my parents and older sister. I am writing to you because I am very, very scared.

Today, I heard my parents talking about a 15-year-old girl who was married to a man who is over 40 years old. Just two months ago, my parents were talking about an 11-year-old girl who was married to another over 40-year-old man. Imagine that – these young girls marrying men older than their own fathers! How could this happen?

I heard that one reason why these girls, who are not much older to me and my sister, got married is because they are very poor.

My daddy just lost his job because he was in a serious accident and cannot go to work anymore. My mummy only works part-time because she has to look after my daddy and my sister and me. I love my parents very much, but I’m scared that we are now poor and that my parents will marry my sister and me to these very old men.

I don’t think I am ready to get married. I still like to play with my dolls. My sister and I play at keeping house but I don’t think we can really do it like Mummy does in the real world. Although I don’t really like going to school (I prefer staying at home and playing with my toys), my parents said that I must go to school and study hard so that when I am big I can be clever and help many people. They said that I can even be like you – a prime minister!

I sometimes watch you on TV. I’m not sure what you are saying, but I think you have a very kind and handsome face. And my daddy likes you very much. He said that you are a good man and a very good prime minister because you are hardworking and do many things for the citizens of the country to make us strong and excellent. I think you also do good things for the little citizens of the country – like me!

I think I’d like that very much! To study hard and become a prime minister just like you. But I won’t be able to if my parents marry me off while I’m still a child. I am writing to you because my big cousin, my kakak, who is studying in Universiti Teknologi Mara told me and my sister that in your election manifesto you said that you do not want to allow children to get married. I like my kakak. She is very kind and clever.

I am so confused because of these stories I heard about children still getting married even after you won the elections. I am even more scared because when my mummy and daddy were talking, they said that the minister in charge of women and children said it is ok that children get married if the children agreed. I think the word my mummy used is “consent”?

I thought this minister is supposed to protect all of us children. Why can’t the minister do something to protect me and other children like me? Can you do something, please? Can you protect us? Please help us! Please help me. So no one marries me off.

But is this correct? Can children like me agree to get married?

Last year, my kakak told me and my sister to be careful because there are bad big men and women out there who make friends with children like me, and sometimes our parents too. They say nice things to us and give us sweets and other things we may like. They give our parents food and money. And once we become their friend, they make us do bad, bad things.

She used a funny word – she said these bad big people “groom” little children. I remember the word because my sister told her she thought “groom” was when we got dressed up and combed our hair.

But my kakak said it was the same word and that we must be careful. She told us a story of a man who came to Malaysia and did bad things to many children and even wanted to marry one of them when she turned 16 so that the police could not arrest him and send him to jail even when he was doing these bad things to her and to so many other children.

Does this mean that the police cannot protect me when people do bad things to me? Why? My mummy always tells me not to be naughty because otherwise the police officer will catch me and put me in jail. Why does the officer want to catch me and not the bad people who do bad things to children?

I don’t want this to happen to me and my sister. I don’t want us to be married. We are too little. Please look after us because the other minister does not seem to be able to. And if my parents are poor, they can’t help me. Does this just happen to poor people and poor children only?

Love,
Tasha

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VOICE OF THE CHILDREN is an NGO advocating for law and policy reform to ensure the rights of every child in Malaysia are protected and no longer at risk of violation. -Mkini