The daughter MH17 left behind, and her journey back to hope

 Twelve years after losing her mother aboard Malaysia Airlines Flight MH17, Diyana Yazeera reflects on grief, forgiveness and finding purpose.

Diyana Yazeera overcame grief to earn a scholarship to study law in the UK, before being admitted as an advocate and solicitor of the High Court of Malaya last year. (Diyana Yazeera pic)

PETALING JAYA:

When Malaysia Airlines Flight MH370 mysteriously disappeared from radar on March 8, 2014, Dora Shahila Kassim was left shaken.

Having served as a MAS stewardess for nearly 19 years since leaving high school, the tragedy hit close to home. Not only had she lost some of her closest colleagues, she had also originally been scheduled to be on that very flight.

A last-minute roster change spared her life. But fate had other plans.

Less than five months later, on July 17, 2014, Dora, the chief stewardess aboard MAS Flight MH17, was among the 298 people killed when the aircraft travelling from Amsterdam to Kuala Lumpur was shot down over eastern Ukraine.

Twelve years later, her daughter, Diyana Yazeera, speaks with FMT Lifestyle about her journey through grief, healing and finding purpose.

Dora Shahila Kassim served as chief stewardess aboard Malaysia Airlines Flight MH17, which was shot down over eastern Ukraine in 2014. (Diyana Yazeera pic)

Diyana had been at her boarding school in Seremban during Ramadan when she received the news on Friday morning that her mother’s plane had been shot down.

“At that point I was in denial and shock because the last time we spoke was just a few days before her flight. I’d called to ask if she would be picking me up on Saturday,” she said.

Diyana was just 15 when she lost her mother, whom she describes as her best friend.

For a time, her maternal grandmother became her guardian, but Diyana spent much of her teenage years moving between the homes of different relatives.

“From Form Three until I was 18, I completely neglected my studies. I was in a really dark place. I would receive the exam paper, push it to one side and just sleep.

“My mum was no longer here, so I just felt like, what was the point of me going on with life?”

Diyana’s mother used to joke that she was destined to become a lawyer – a prediction that has ultimately come true. (Diyana Yazeera pic)

Despite poor SPM results, Diyana gradually rebuilt her life and became one of the top 10 students in her foundation programme. She eventually earned a scholarship to study law in the United Kingdom.

Her mother, she recalled with smile, used to tease that she was destined to become a lawyer. In the end, that is exactly what happened.

Last year, she was admitted as an advocate and solicitor of the High Court of Malaya, and now works as a legal executive at a security technology company.

“I’d like to think she’s proud,” Diyana said, holding back tears.

“My mother was so independent. She was a single mum and the sole breadwinner in the family. I wish I could become even half the woman she was.”

Last July, the European Court of Human Rights ruled that Russia was responsible for the downing of MH17. The Kremlin, however, has rejected the ruling and denied responsibility.

Reflecting on this lack of accountability, she opines that justice is only possible when those responsible don’t hold significant power. “And that’s sad. It’s something we need to change for future generations,” she said.

Diyana says forgiveness has helped her heal, even as many families continue searching for closure over the MH17 tragedy. (Hizami Safri @ FMT Lifestyle)

But even long before that ruling, Diyana had already chosen forgiveness. Meeting other victims’ families during first-anniversary commemorations in Amsterdam helped her realise she was not alone in her grief.

“I connected with some of the victims’ families there, and I still keep in touch with them. It just shows that grief knows no race, no religion – we share the same pain.”

While many people remember MH17 only on its anniversary, reminders of her mother are woven into Diyana’s everyday life.

“A colleague recently offered me a mangosteen and I started bawling because it was my favourite fruit, and Mum used to bring home kilos of it,” she shared.

The tragedy has also left her with a fear of flying. “During take-off or landing, I start hysterically screaming,” she admitted, adding that over the years, she has learnt to cope with it better.

By sharing her story, Diyana hopes the victims of MH17 will never be forgotten. Above all, she hopes their families will one day find the closure they deserve. - FMT